Morning , just popped down to feed the animals , bad news i am afraid , Hugh Fearnley Newmanstall , got eaten by a raptochicken in the night , not to panic i have buried him in the old woodland drop , but i will need a hand to extend the ground oven as the offending beast ( which i killed with my bare hands ) even when plucked , is huge should feed us all for the weekend .
Oi Lucy , i see your cunning plan to talk about me didn't work ! they were too wrapped up in tents and footprints !
I just hope i can last , until someone else that can cook/open tins etc arrives , know what ? i might dig him up , sit him by the fire , its company until he starts to smell , then chuck him straight on the fire !
Right back up to camp , to erect an anti rapto fence .
Ivan...