1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.
  2. Hey Guest, We're having our annual Winter Moot and we'd love you to come. PLEASE LOOK HERE to secure your place and get more information.
    For forum threads CLICK HERE
    Dismiss Notice

" Beach Meet " Uh Oh ! Friday The 13TH...

Discussion in 'England South West' started by Ivan..., Jun 19, 2012.

  1. Ivan...

    Ivan... Ex member

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2011
    Messages:
    1,771
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Dartmoor
    Hi De Hi ! campers, just got off that brilliant invention the telephone ,to our Lucy , and unfortunately things have conspired against her so she will be unable to attend on this occasion and will be sadly missed , but i have promised her a late night gang phone call from camp beach to let her know what she is missing and hopefully she will be reunited with the crazy gang very soon.

    On a lighter note , not long returned from a night out in Bradley Woods , very interesting safe to say it rained a bit ! Beat my previous record in a tent , now 28 hours , still i was with very good company (sorry Adam ) which made it more than bearable!

    So as our esteemed gopher/car park attendant/bikini designer, Itchy said there is one place left ,(all aboard the nut bus) so be quick .

    And all this talk of weather , i rather like Richies approach to it .
     
  2. Bucephalas

    Bucephalas Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2012
    Messages:
    1,058
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Chepstow, Wales
    My gift to you all;

    [​IMG]

    Better pack your speedos and sun cream!

    :camping:
     
  3. savagebushcraft

    savagebushcraft Settler

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2011
    Messages:
    647
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Northants
    How long did you spend on photoshop making that up? Or is it the forecast from last year? :p
     
  4. savagebushcraft

    savagebushcraft Settler

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2011
    Messages:
    647
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Northants
    Here's a genuine forecast that includes Thursday and Friday. 75% and 70% precipitation isn't what I'd class as 0% chance of rain lol.

    [​IMG]
     
  5. Bucephalas

    Bucephalas Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2012
    Messages:
    1,058
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Chepstow, Wales
    Adam, as Odd-Ball would say,........."Don't hit me with them negative vibes so early in the morning!"

    PMA my friend

    If enough people believe......
     
  6. savagebushcraft

    savagebushcraft Settler

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2011
    Messages:
    647
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Northants
    Ah, who cares about a little rain anyway. It's a beach, can't get much wetter than that really :D
     
  7. redandshane

    redandshane Native

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2007
    Messages:
    1,581
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Batheaston
    In order that people don't think we are just a bunch of ne'erdowells messing around' I am publishing a short selection of some of the skills based workshops that will be available over the coming weekend

    First up a new and exciting take on first aid-World exclusive preview

    Self aid for buttock wounds. single and repeated
    Our kind host Ivan has developed a very personal interest in this area and has been practicing practical self administered techniques which could save your life if you are ever stabbed in the behind.
    Also some campfire chat around Lymes disease and how to catch it.
    He's almost a Doctor

    Next up and not to be missed if you want to appear to be moving towards an ultra lightweight set up

    Rich the horse will be expanding his theories and practice around talking about a lightweight set up; while hanging a great big Zebra pot off your overfilled 70 litre rucksack.This talk may also include tips on how to manage your " ultralite" gear in the field if Rich manages one trip without losing something.

    Blink and you will miss this next one

    Most of us will have heard all this before and walked away disinterested; but our resident camo expert will be telling us all about concealment and the pros and cons of various military and civvy camos.
    Yes Paul "as long as its green" Newman will be talking about and modelling some new and exciting developments in the colour green.This is really miraculous readers as he is in fact dead.Last chance to get genned up on the glory of green?

    Something for everyone here

    Social skills training-Yes I know not one for the purist schrafters but variety is the spice of life

    Adam has kindly agreed to let us in the secret of his social success;in business around the campfire and strictly up the stables with the ladies
    I personal;l feel I need this one so count me in Adam.
    Adam will also be telling us how easy it is to get everyone else to put you to bed ;once you have mastered a few simple techniques. using only a bottle and a suggestion.
    Get there early for this one or you may get the sign language version. Talented lad

    The next one is guaranteed to change your life
    I will be demonstrating my own personal take on foraging and the relevance of CRB checks on fellow campers.Ivan will expand on his "waste of time theory"with regard to wild foraging
    A sub class on this may be my Kelly kettle demo- to get you in the mood here is a quick review "Not worth picking up"
    Again Ivan will be helping out with some real forging for lobsters tips
    Where is the nearest M&S?

    There you go folks all this and much more, but if all this education seems a bit serious and a bit too much. I am sure we will have time in our busy schedule for general mayhem drinking eating and laughing.


    Jolly Boys..........ASSSEMBLE
     
  8. Ivan...

    Ivan... Ex member

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2011
    Messages:
    1,771
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Dartmoor
    Thank Goodness, at last some worth while comments from one of our more educated among the group, i feel a few alterations to content.

    Firstly the Lymes talk will be a closed thing , so as not to bore the masses like an old man talking about his operation scars , maybe topped off with inguinal hernia tale (old hat)

    After serious research into the buttock thing , i have been misled (some old prison movie footage) It is in fact to aim at the femeral artery on the front of the thigh ,upon ringing the door bell.

    The lobster forage is cancelled, as M&S only do them in the week leading up to Christmas , and the dressed variety is particularly difficult to come by due to cctv and privately employed ,heavy handed security guards .

    I for one wont be attending the green man thing as i have heard it too many times before and am slowly becoming a convert , and have felt like i am dead in recent weeks anyway.

    The beach seems to bring out the best in Adam (Richard Dreyfuss) and with his competition prize in the bag , this one is not to be missed , an all new episode , with exciting new content , can't wait .

    On the Rich thing , i am vey keen to see the ultralite take on shoreline equipment , as even larger items can be buried in the sand , for later retrieval, always brings something new and innovative , desireable and expensive to filch.

    Dave53's masterclass on ground set up is one i am salivating over , as is to physically watch him trying to sleep , and the eerie echo created by him sleeping on his back will i am sure be haunting (recording a must )

    This time i am taking a real chance , not having an interpreter along , for the Sweatty forage amble ,talk,and resulting cookery class ,will i am positive be very informative , but as with all professionals , one will come away enlightened astounded but , when asked in the pub at a later date will have no idea what the bloke said .

    Any additions to the list much appreciated

    Thanks again Steve .

    Ivan...
     
  9. savagebushcraft

    savagebushcraft Settler

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2011
    Messages:
    647
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Northants
    I also have a new instrument to add to the existing orchestra (previously, only a harmonica), which arrived the other day. A Jew's harp (also known as a jaw harp), which I have been looking at all week. No idea how the two instruments will sound together, as I can only attempt to play one at a time. Could be interesting if no one else wants to take one of these instruments in their mouth :confused:, as I will have to find some other way of passing air through the harmonica, or find some other orifice to press the harp against...

    ...still, I'm sure it won't make any difference once beer o'clock hits.
     
  10. redandshane

    redandshane Native

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2007
    Messages:
    1,581
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Batheaston

    See folks these genuinely are social skills to be marveled at; watch and learn as Adam uses cheap musical instruments in his very own up the stables way
     
  11. savagebushcraft

    savagebushcraft Settler

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2011
    Messages:
    647
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Northants
    Ivan's interpreter will be covering such sayings as...
    "Ey would nee know, Ey've neer treed et" meaning "I would not know. I have never tried it"
    "Dinnie fall doon the steers, and bong yer heed" meaning " Do not fall down the stairs, and bang your head"
    "many a mickle makes a muckle" meaning ... we'll have to find out at the meet, as I have no idea.
     
  12. TeaBee

    TeaBee Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2011
    Messages:
    37
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Devon
    I hope you Jolly Boys have a good forage, catch a bass or two and find a few breaks in the weather. Shame I coudn't join you this time but I will be dodging the showers on the beach at Southwold this weekend. Hope to join you all on a moor or in a wood sometime soon.
     
  13. Ivan...

    Ivan... Ex member

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2011
    Messages:
    1,771
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Dartmoor
    Hi Trev, glad to see youm still about , enjoy your own break, and as you have said if we ever get any summer we will get together in a wood soon.

    Right ! I appreciate that most of you have let me know your arrival times , if anyone is not sure please shout.

    Upon parking, walk down the concrete beach slip and turn LEFT ! (MOST IMPORTANT BIT) Follow the coast around for approx half a mile to the headland turn the corner and thats where we will be .

    Alternatively, walk towards the concrete slip , just before there are some steps on your left saying coastal path , up through the woods , follow this path for approx 3/4 mile and you will descend to our spot its the first beach you will come to.

    I have various peoples intended timings , and will do my best to come and greet you , but if the chaps that are already there just say whos coming next and when ? I will remember , i know it sounds a bit Harry Tate , but the mobile reception is dreadful, and i don't want anybody in tears at the parking area.

    For those bringing too much kit (you know who you are ) Don't struggle trying to carry it all in one trip , as you know there are plenty of willing hands to help.

    There is a fresh water run off to the beach close by , but i would be a bit concerned from a chemicals on the fields etc , point of view .So if everyone brings a bottle of water with them we will be fine .

    Trying not to repeat myself , but firewood is covered and we are all chucking a fiver in to a kitty to cover food and other essentials!

    As always any last minute changes,questions please raise them.

    Bring it on !!

    Ivan...
     
  14. Bucephalas

    Bucephalas Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2012
    Messages:
    1,058
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Chepstow, Wales
    Damn you all!
    Having just caught up on the Jolly Boys latest, I've now just unpacked the car and re-packed my gear reducing it down to a mere TWO 50KG packs plus water, cast Iron cookware and canoes. I've also added a metal detector to combe the beach and recover my gear when done!
    Was considering bringing a 3/4 tonne skip too to help the swettie with his foraging class but it won't fit on the roof rack.

    I've also packed 2 ltrs of KY for my new masterclass. This isn't available in olive green but I do have some containing ground glass for those put in the naughty corner.
     
  15. Ivan...

    Ivan... Ex member

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2011
    Messages:
    1,771
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Dartmoor
    Probably the last call for the Jolly Boys Beach Meet , any last minute questions , say now or forever hold your peace ! Skate , Myself, Adam ,Green Man and Richie will be safely ensconced at the beach from tomorrow afternoon , and although the met office are doing their best to put us off , it wont work as they are liards.
    Friday, Saturday and Sunday's forecasts are a lot better , so pack your trunks and in some cases bikinis, would also be nice if some of us can bring beach type games and toys !

    really looking forward to getting together again ,as it seems like ages .

    Roll on tomorrow ,see you guys there , drive safe.

    Ivan...
     
  16. savagebushcraft

    savagebushcraft Settler

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2011
    Messages:
    647
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Northants
    Can't make it tomorrow, but will be there Friday. O2 are having some problems with the network, which means I will have no means of communication, while en route. :(
     
  17. Ivan...

    Ivan... Ex member

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2011
    Messages:
    1,771
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Dartmoor
    Evening pop pickers. Up two down three , straight in at this weeks number one Ivan and the beach boys ,with .They're round they're blue they're valium and whats more i'm on twenty a day , and i 'm right out of it !

    By the way mate ,i won pipe smoker of the year 1974 mate , lungmungus tobaccotastic.

    Pas dele your on que nous

    drain pipe trousertastic .

    Lee did you put anything in my tea ?
     
  18. Ichneumon

    Ichneumon Nomad

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2011
    Messages:
    357
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Lancashire (previously Dartmoor)
    Err, like..... erm, really far out man! :rolleyes: Oh wow man, didn't know Ivan was a head - freaky man! Cool knowing I'm not the only one who's, like, got his head together and in the scene.

    I'm a bit spaced out at the moment so I don't want to get into any heavy scenes but I thought I'd better let you dudes know I might be late tomorrow. Bummer man! Had to do some, like, work man - to like get some bread together.

    I'll see you guys, like....... whenever - assuming I don't get busted by the pigs!

    Hendrix lives! Peace and love man. V

    P.S. Good gear this!

    Sent from some freaky gizmo I got in my spaceship. :cool:
     
  19. redandshane

    redandshane Native

    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2007
    Messages:
    1,581
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Batheaston
    Readers
    His love of green was often to be seen in his posts from the grave

    If Ivan is gonna keep that up I am practicing my one handed drowning technique

    "Oh I do like to be beside the sea side"
     
  20. Bucephalas

    Bucephalas Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 19, 2012
    Messages:
    1,058
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Chepstow, Wales
    Ivan, read your text messages man!
     

Share This Page