I wonder if "Hog many" will be cancelled at the end of this year
I don't believe so but I've heard that Tesco won't be stocking Cliff Richard's Christmas record this year.
It's a remake of Mistletoe and Swine.
Martin
Flu virus, now even I'm worried!
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I don't believe so but I've heard that Tesco won't be stocking Cliff Richard's Christmas record this year.
It's a remake of Mistletoe and Swine.
Martin
Right, I decided to get to the bottom of this once and for all, so I phoned the government's swine flu hot line. Guess what???
All I got was crackling.
Martin
All I got was crackling.
Martin
Dash it the jokes are making me laugh too hard!
I thought that as one who likes to be prepared (ex-Scout Leader and member of a Survival site....) I was ready for anything...however, as I am suffering from a very chesty cold (no I have not visited Mexico, Scotland or any other Swine Flu area...) I have now coughed half my lung tissue all over the keyboard due to excessive laughter!
I was not prepared for that!
Now I have a gross job of getting the keyboard sanitized!
If choke to death due to these jokes will I be a confirmed victim of Swine Flue despite all my preparations?
I thought that as one who likes to be prepared (ex-Scout Leader and member of a Survival site....) I was ready for anything...however, as I am suffering from a very chesty cold (no I have not visited Mexico, Scotland or any other Swine Flu area...) I have now coughed half my lung tissue all over the keyboard due to excessive laughter!
I was not prepared for that!
Now I have a gross job of getting the keyboard sanitized!
If choke to death due to these jokes will I be a confirmed victim of Swine Flue despite all my preparations?
i personally think something needs to be done about the excessive level of bad puns in this thread
you lot have missed your calling, you should write headlines for the sun or something
you lot have missed your calling, you should write headlines for the sun or something
D
Deleted dude 7861
Guest
It's easy to spot whether you have 'Swine Flu', you will come out in rashers!!
Martin
Try using some oinkment
D
Deleted dude 7861
Guest
A bear, a lion and a pig meet in the forest.
The bear said, “If I roar in the forests of North America, the entire forest is shivering with fear.”
The Lion said, “If I roar on the great plains of Africa, the entire savannah is shivering with fear.”
The pig said,”Big deal. I only have to cough, and the entire planet sh*ts itself.”
The bear said, “If I roar in the forests of North America, the entire forest is shivering with fear.”
The Lion said, “If I roar on the great plains of Africa, the entire savannah is shivering with fear.”
The pig said,”Big deal. I only have to cough, and the entire planet sh*ts itself.”
All I can say is that I hope all the pooh pooh chorus is correct and this does not amount to anything. Otherwise I fear the Grim Reaper may wipe that smirk off of your collective faces.
Excellent Celt! That made me laugh
You're right humblebumble. Some people have made a right 'pigs ear' of those jokes and should 'trot' along now............they really should be given the 'chop'........and save their bacon before it's too late.
I'm sure we'll all be just fine Chinkapin. I don't think the pooh, pooh chorus is smirking as such, but maybe we will be, at the panickers after it's all fizzled out to nothing. (A few weeks time at my guess)
I used to have a pet Newt called Tiny. Everyone used to ask why he was called Tiny, so I said it is because he is my newt...
I'll get my bags.
I'll get my bags.
But its selling Alcohol hand cleaner.
Dad is getting some for the Chapel, I advised him to get a decent make, not an own brand, to check for flammability.
Inflammable things are `good.`
(We have the Govt leaflet at St Loys, no ones read it, no doubt its also full of very lame jokes...)
Dad is getting some for the Chapel, I advised him to get a decent make, not an own brand, to check for flammability.
Inflammable things are `good.`
(We have the Govt leaflet at St Loys, no ones read it, no doubt its also full of very lame jokes...)
I used to be a Werewolf, but Im alright............. Nooooouuuuuuwwwwww !
Why are there no headache tablets in the jungle?...........because the parrots eat-'em-all.
:sadwavey:
I used to be a Werewolf, but Im alright............. Nooooouuuuuuwwwwww !
Why are there no headache tablets in the jungle?...........because the parrots eat-'em-all.
:sadwavey:
Old ones are the bestwhy do anarchist drink herbal tea? cos all proper-tea is theft
i've got one about mixie as well, but it's very long-winded and less than hilarious
i've got one about mixie as well, but it's very long-winded and less than hilarious
I can't have that anymore I love grilled cheese; good plain bread, with rich strong red cheddar roasted under the grill until it's bubbling almost crispy.....maybe sliced tomatoes on it too with wee slivers of red onion, top it with flat leaved parsley 
......fake cheese is vile 
I've just had dinner and here I'm thinking really hard to not go and make cheese on toast.
cheers,
Toddy
I love grilled cheese; good plain bread, with rich strong red cheddar roasted under the grill until it's bubbling almost crispy.....maybe sliced tomatoes on it too with wee slivers of red onion, top it with flat leaved parsley ......fake cheese is vile I've just had dinner and here I'm thinking really hard to not go and make cheese on toast.
cheers,
Toddy
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