If you’ve a bald head & it’s chilly outside, put a rabbit on your head..from a distance it’ll look like hare.
Bushcraft Jokes
- Thread starter Dean
- Start date
Bloke says to his mate,why do scuba divers fall backwards into the water,and his mate says,'cause if they fell forward they would still be in the boat.
Just a quick reminder for those who recieved books off me for Christmas,they are due back at the library on the 10th January.Thankyou.
I was at a camp site recently, and took a poll. The campers didn't understand why their tent fell down
I made my wife's dream come true,and we were married in a castle.Although you wouldn't have known it from the look on her face as we were bouncing around.
THE DIFFERENCE IF YOU MARRY A GIRL FROM LIVERPOOL
Three friends married women from 3 different parts of the world.
The first man married a woman from the Philippines, he told her that she was to do the dishes and house cleaning, it took a couple of days but on the third day, the house was spotlessly clean and all the dishes were washed and put away.
The second man married a women from Thailand, he gave his wife orders that she was to keep the house clean, do the laundry and cook his meals,. The first day he was disappointed and seen no changes, but by the third day the house was clean the laundry all done, and a huge dinner was on the table when he got home from work.
The third man married a girl from Liverpool, he told her to keep the house clean. get the dishes washed, mow the lawn, do the laundry and have a hot meal ready when he gets home from work, He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he couldn't see anything either, but on the third day, some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a little out of his left eye, and his arm had healed enough so he could make himself a sandwich, and load the dishwasher and make a start on the laundry, although he still has some difficulty when he passes water.
Man's early attempts at trapping needed a lot of refining... 
Why do elephants paint their balls red?
To better hide in cherry trees!
What's the loudest sound in the forest?
A giraffe eating cherries!
I went to the doctor with a hearing problem,the doctor said "can you descibe the symptoms".I said Homer is a fat lad,and Marge has got blue hair.
Got bored this morning,so changed all the sweet wrappers around in a box of Celebration.The wife isn't happy,she got her snickers in a twix. Merry Christmas.
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