Stoopid jokes

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One night a man walks into a bar looking sad. The barman asks the man what he wants.

The man says “Oh just a beer”.

The barman asked the man “What's wrong,why are you so down today?”.

The man said “My wife and i got into a fight,and she said she wouldn't talk to me for a month”.

The barman said “So what's wrong with that?"

The man said “Well, the month is up tonight”.
 
Why did the turkey cross the road?




Because it's a helicopter!



My son. Aged 6.........

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I was in the garden the other day when I heard music. I looked around and realised it was coming from the veg patch. As I walked over I could hear it was actually Bee Gees songs!!

I just couldn't find where it was coming from and eventually I got down on my hands and knees to see if I could find the source. Finally I realised it was in the herb section, then it struck me...............................

.....................

It was just the Chives talkin'!
 
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