Nun joke

[Eric_Methven]

A taxi driver picks up a Nun. She gets into the taxi, and notices that the very handsome taxi driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring.

He replies . "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you".

She answers, "My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.

"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me".

She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that. First, you have to be single and secondly you must be Catholic.

"The taxi driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!

"OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley.

"The nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a prostitute blush. But when they get back on the road, the taxi driver starts crying.

"My dear child," said the nun, why are you crying?"
"Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish.

"The nun says, "That's OK. My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween Party."

 

[Matt Weir]

 

[Bushcraft4life]

I have a much ruder version of that joke, only it envolves a bus driver

 

[fred gordon]

Eric, you need to get out more!!!

 

[andy_e]

Now I know where that grandson of yours is getting his risque jokes from Eric, or is it the other way around?

 

[Eric_Methven]

Now I know where that grandson of yours is getting his risque jokes from Eric, or is it the other way around?

Yes, he told me some really filthy schoolboy jokes on the drive up. I think he was seeing if he could shock me. So as punishment I turned off the rap music he was listening to on the radio and tuned it to Classic FM for the rest of the journey. Not to be beaten though, he just started conducting the orchestra by waving his fingers around and humming loudly and deliberately out of tune.

Eric