How do I get in a hammock when paraletic?

[LazySod]

Been thinking about this one for a while, visited Middlemud twice for the day, and ended up sat around the campfire, after dark, while half a dozen bottles of 'Home brew' spirits are passed around multiple times (I had to 'Pass' every offer cos of driving home).

Now in the expectation that a similar thing will happening this next weekend (and im not driving anywhere), how do i get into a hammock after a skinful without doing a faceplant in the mud?

Do i sling my hammock deliberately low to allow for the otherwise comical 'straddle' technique, or do i fashion a couple of rope spreaders to allow a bigger target area for my butt?

As you may have guessed, I haven't got into a hammock sober or drunk as yet and any cameramen within the vacinity at the alloted time will be shot at dawn.

Advice, photo's, do not's, and comments needed.

 

[Chips]

You're going to end up sleeping collapsed on the earth next to your hammock, I predict.

 

[Chris G]

Tony, When are you going to site? I'll be there from Friday lunchtime and will be sleeping in a hammock again, so I can show you the two methods that I use.

Chris

 

[DoctorSpoon]

Accept the laws of gravity and just put the hammock on the ground in the first place!

 

[Tadpole]

Accept the laws of gravity and just put the hammock on the ground in the first place!

I agree, you'll still have that spinning rocking feeling, without the risk of being on "you've been Framed"

 

[SimonM]

How do I get in a hammock when paraletic?

Carefully, very carefully!

 

[durulz]

Close your eyes and use The Force.

 

[Shewie]

Does it matter ? You`re only going to fall out anyway

 

[LazySod]

These words do not instil me with much confidence, I foresee camera flashes and much tittering.

Im arriving Friday morning (early), so i might get some practice in unseen.

 

[Shewie]

It might be a good idea to hang it about 3" off the ground just in case you take a tumble Tony

 

[Shambling Shaman]

Pitch your hammock not to far form the social area and drink in your hammock and just stay there...

No seriously, I find its the boot removal that gets me, If you plan your bed routine carefully ie have your sleeping bad turned down ready a dry area to SIT and get boots off..
And obviously practice getting in and out before the drinking starts

 

[Tripitaka]

Ask StJon - he managed it at Morch's last meet!

 

[LazySod]

Why has nobody done a photo-tutorial on this subject?

Is this some sort of cruel initiation, 3 face plants later, you all tell me the secret?

Would bringing a short step ladder help?

Could i lower myself in with some sort of winch system?

So many Q's.

 

[korvin karbon]

Ask StJon - he managed it at Morch's last meet!

damn you beat me to it. I did notice i was the only one who checked he was still alive

 

[Toddy]

I keep being told that I'll be warmer, more comfortable, have a better outdoor experience, etc., etc., using a hammock, and that's without me being paralytic..........you're not filling me with confidence on these contraptions folks

Are you sure it's worth the bother The ground is at least stable......usually

atb,
M

 

[jojo]

Come on guys, you've got to catch him at it! and then send the vid to You've been framed! Thats 250 quids for you then....

 

[Nelis]

Oh come on with the proper preperation getting in the hammock when drunk is easy, just pay extra attention when setting up the hammock.

Do the following.

Spread the hammock out on the ground, between to trees.........

AND LEAVE IT THERE !!!!

 

[statikpunk]

buy a hennessy hammock since you go in through the bottom and its all sealed you cant fall out when inebriated ! dont ask me how I know that or why that influenced my decision on what hammock to own

 

[andywinkk]

you say faceplant in the mud?

the weather forcast is cold so the mud will be rock hard so you may end up with a bloody nose,

 

[BorderReiver]

Forget the hammock. Put on your warm gear under waterproof smock and trousers before you start to sup and just curl up and sleep beside the fire. That way you won't trip over anything and damage yourself.