Frame of mind/Psychology of solo trips.

[w00dsmoke]

I'm very interested in recent discussions regarding an individuals frame of mind/psychological makeup while on solo trips. Many of us on here will know of(and may even do so ourselves) people who regulary go solo for over night trips so do you think they have a different mindset that empowers them rather than disables them and what is the psychological explanation for it?

I have my own reasons and I'll explore/share them if the discussion expands.

I know of a few people on here who do fairly commiting overnight trips solo so it's not that uncommon (I think possibly most people on here overnight with company with occassional solo trips but could be wrong on that) yet society "frowns" upon the "loner" but hey that's another discussion altogether.

 

[Ishmael]

I nearly always go out alone. Only last Saturday I returned from a 3-day, 36 mile hike, camping in woods and cooking on a fire. On day trips though, and overnight canoe trips, I often take one of my sons with me.

 

[durulz]

I don't often do solo overnighters. I have done, but only a handful of times.
When I have I have enjoyed it. But I've never felt 'away' from anywhere or anyone - possibly because I've been no more than a mile or so from home and can see house lights etc. It's really felt like little more than sleeping outside, rather than having time away.
However, over the summer I had a 'west country adventure' on my own. I spent 10 days in the Somerset/Devon/Dorset moving around and wild camping.
Again, I was hardly remote. I saw people all the time, although I don't recall speaking to anyone beyond 'thank you's' and the like. I spent my days amongst civilisation, and my evenings out alone. And after just a few days I did feel isolated and estranged. As I am sure anyone who has lived in a large city can testify, it's entirely possible (arguably symptomatic) to be surrounded by people and still feel alone.
I did during my 10 day jaunt.
Human beings are intrinsically gregarious and social animals.
I think I did even succumb to morbid thoughts. Being alone seems to encourage self-reflection and I recall being in the middle of a hot dusty farmer's field some miles south of Bristol. I was totally knackered and exhausted, sweating like a trooper, and I recall thinking that no one knew where I was at that moment, no one would know if anything befell me. I remember thinking how small and insignificant our lives were, how unimportant we were (yup - I was having a severe attack of the melancholies). About a 100 yards away was a line of trees and I thought to myself that I could curl up beneath the trees and just die and how little it would really mean.
I really was bloody knackered and it really was very hot. I felt absolutely drained.
However, I also remember shortly afterwards passing a sign saying that Bristol was 5 miles away. I have never looked forward to getting somewhere as I was looking forward to getting into Bristol that day (not a sentence you get to use very often).
It was Sartre who said our lives only have meaning if we can share our experiences with other people. That seemed to be the lesson I learnt that day. Therefore, it would suggest that 'loners' are missing something - in the same way that psychopaths have no concept of other people's pain and emotions.
Perhaps.

 

[SimonM]

I spend many solo nights in the woods - "Me Time" allows me to recharge and de stress. It also has the advantage of making me appreciate what I have when I get home. When out alone, I always leave an approx grid to SWMBO, so that covers me for the unexpected accident, so H & S box ticked!

I enjoy solo trips as they allow me to do whatever I choose, whenever I choose, be that reading a book under a tree, tracking or playing with sharps/fire.

Conversly, I do like going to Meets and seeing other like minded souls!

Simon

 

[groundhog]

I enjoy my time alone and am happy to spend a week or so by myself. I run a homeless hostel for a job so am constantly dealing with people at work so I enjoy some me time just reflecting and enjoying some peace. I did the pennine way a couple of years back and went with a friend as far as Dufton and completed alone. But then again I have been regarded as strange and semi detached in the past.

 

[dogwood]

I very often go on solo trips, the longest one was three weeks and the typical one is from four to six days. I nearly always hunt alone as well.

I've done this my entire life without a second thought.

I love my family and friends, but I also love time alone in nature -- a week or two alone and far from people is a balm for the soul.

I've never understood the anxiety with which some people approach the idea of solo tripping -- it's just the woods (or desert sometimes for me) and it's not your enemy.

 

[Kerne]

I enjoy my time alone and am happy to spend a week or so by myself. I run a homeless hostel for a job so am constantly dealing with people at work so I enjoy some me time just reflecting and enjoying some peace.

I'm in your gang. After a week of teaching recalcitrant 16 year olds, a weekend solo is a blessing!

I walk solo and with mates and with SWMBO. Each type of walk is different and I enjoy them all. I find I am happy in my own company and have never felt myself to be lonely. (Indeed, someone told me that the best thing about walking solo was that you were always guaranteed intelligent conversation. ) This coming weekend, however, I will be in the Northern Pennines with a couple of mates and, no doubt, we will put the world to rights as we walk.

I agree that there is a certain mindset that helps you to enjoy solo trips, but, this probably applies to other (if not all) areas of one's life. If you are not happy in your own company when surrounded by others, you are unlikely to find peace when in the wilds on your own.

 

[Firebringer]

I think once you get past the initial over active imagination of being alone at night in the woods it's preferable. My work is very people interaction based. Out with work I prefer to just be left alone and to my own devices.

I appreciate that standing over a Co-Op bucket barbeque in a Scottish Glen with a six pack of lager, MP3 player in the pitch dark isn't probably the favoured hobby of an entirely sane individual but it suits me.

 

[HillBill]

I nearly always go out on my own. I can't find what i'm looking for if someone is there. I've always been like that though. It doesn't bother me at all. Same with shooting, hiking etc I'll take someone along if they want to come but i don't go looking for someone to come with me. I get to do what i want when alone so thats always the better option.

Even in the military i was picked out for this reason, trained up as a sniper and sent on my merry way either on my own or with a spotter into some pretty remote locations for weeks at a time. I miss that.

 

[DavidJT]

I've never done a longer trip on my own, only short ones. Would like to do a longer trip though, as I think after 3 or 4 nights you would probably get into a different state of mind, and discover some interesting stuff about yourself.
I think there are lots of really knowledgeable and experienced bushcrafters around though, who for one reason or another don't enjoy solo trips, and I think that's fine. We should all just enjoy the outdoors alone OR together with friends, however we wish. Both works for me.

 

[Toddy]

I wander alone, I've always enjoyed that calm contentment as I wandered and foraged. Then I had children and I carried them with me. (Even as adults they *still* instinctively open their mouths if I put my hand up to their faces ) By the time the youngest went to school I was back to foraging on my own again, with their company on Summer evenings or weekends,
HWMBLT just doesn't walk at my pace, or me at his.

I don't camp alone and never have done. I camped with my Dad and brothers, later with my girlfirends, then with my family and now again with friends.
I'm not afeared of the dark or being on my own, but I am gregarious, I do like and thoroughly enjoy company.

Humans are social animals, even if it's a society of very few.

cheers,
Toddy

 

[Broch]

As a teenager I spent quite a bit of time camping rough on my own on the North Yorkshire Moors (in the early seventies!). I still find a group of more than three or four a crowd. I enjoy family weekends and even longer trips with just the Mrs but being out on my own is still an absolute pleasure.

I spend about six hours a day alone and walk every day on my own - if you don't count the Springer! I don't think I could survive without the solo time any more.

I'm still capable of being spooked in the wild at night though! He who is not occasionally scared of what might be has no imagination

Broch

 

[w00dsmoke]

Thanks for expanding your ideas folks...

There's a few themes coming up here from what I can see that have a bearing on the why we go solo or not.

. Space/Time alone being therapeutic/beneficial to compliment or repair damage to another part of ones living (eg compensate for stress in work or time out from the norm)
.Self Reliance
.Convenience- your pace, your decisions/choices
. Physcological make up of the individual (I hate to stress the word loner due to negative inferences, so will use "lone wolf" instead! )
. Fear (motivates folk not to)

So from the replies so far we seem to have a split between those who are in the main "lone wolfs" and those who are occassional "lone wolfs" and those who always are "pack wolfs" (for want of better terminology!). It doesn't really matter what you think you are as long as you are comfortable.

I personally do think there is a mindset that one needs to have to be able to be a "lonewolf" whether occassionally or all the time. From what I see that mindset is usually psychologically strong (to be able to deal with any stresses alone) and be as someone mentioned "at peace with themselves. I think that both are very important. Psychologists are starting to realise the importance of all the benefits of going solo are and often see it as absolutley neccesary to healing hence the expression we so often hear within the caring sector as "taking time out".

I spend a lot of time out and about and to be honest I probably spend about 2/3rds of my time solo and the rest within small groups of friends. The reason being, well I've got a lot of time on my hands at the moment so often it's convenient just to go solo at short notice and well I'm very careful about who I choose to spend time with out in the sticks and as I don't tolerate fools easily I choose those companions/friends carefully.
I spend a lot of time wildlife watching/surveying which is easier solo and I just love the peace and quiet away from the pressures of normal living/work that going solo brings and it is something that means more to me the older I become and these times become more special. I have had until very recently had some very high pressure jobs dealing with difficult people day in and day out and I don't think I could have done them without this other need within me.

Don't get me wrong I love good company and like nothing better than to sit and chat and enjoy it but there is something about going solo that is liberating yet at times a bit scary (e.g. what happens if I break a leg on Rannoch Moor...). I take my dog for company who will never replace good human company but he is an early warning device for when I'm sleeping and we enjoy our company. But the nicest thing about being away is coming back to those who are important in your life, it reinforces that relationship.

So for most people it's about a balance and getting that right is up to them. It's just a shame that in society we have both positive and negative recurring themes regarding "lone wolfs" more so of the negative, but what society in general doesn't emphasise is the benefits of going solo and the relationship that the lone wolf has with "the pack" where it always returns back to.

WS

 

[TeeDee]

Good stuff Woodsmoke.

This link is good for the values of solitude and the art of being Alone but not Lonely.

http://www.zenmoments.org/nothing-and-no-one/

 

[BOD]

...
I agree that there is a certain mindset that helps you to enjoy solo trips, .... If you are not happy in your own company when surrounded by others, you are unlikely to find peace when in the wilds on your own.

There is something missing from those who always need company or stimulation too.

I remember what a friend said about his flatmate who always needed a TV or a radio switched on " He can't bear his own company".

While I firmly believe that wilderness living (or survival) is a community affair, going solo is very beneficial for ones soul.

My best walks and dives have been solo. There is nothing like not speaking for days, or just half a day. It's the best way to relax and to reflect.

It is very easy to find peace alone in the woods. I find no inner demons. Sometimes I have regrets for past actions or words but like knots in wood they have their place and are part of the texture of life.

What's best is that this need not be done just at the campfire but when you are out foraging and just poking around.

A bit off topic, but bringing a young one along is a very good way of child rearing. They switch on to nature so quickly, learn to appreciate silence and their own company.They are constantly experimenting.

Good for their and your mental health and a lot cheaper than silly electronic toys like a Wii

 

[w00dsmoke]

BOD "There is something missing from those who always need company or stimulation too. I remember what a friend said about his flatmate who always needed a TV or a radio switched on " He can't bear his own company". "


I totally agree with this. I think we have all been in the company of individuals who for whatever reason have that personality with a need for that constant stimulation and I do find that the biggest turn off about going with groups of people I don't know well. In Scotland we say "There is a "want" about them, in other words they are uncomfortable and are always trying to fulfil that want or need within that group. Whether this is about control, anxiety or choosing to ignore social cues; it's probably the biggest cause of dysfunction within groups (please don't confuse this with genuine disability-there is a HUGE difference).

It's inrteresting to recognise that universities are now running "wilderness therapy" courses and part of the sylabus in some courses is about the healing value of being alone in the wild and the transformative results it can have on individuals who are receptive to it.

WS


]

 

[TwoSticks]

BOD "There is something missing from those who always need company or stimulation too. I remember what a friend said about his flatmate who always needed a TV or a radio switched on " He can't bear his own company". "


I totally agree with this. I think we have all been in the company of individuals who for whatever reason have that personality with a need for that constant stimulation and I do find that the biggest turn off about going with groups of people I don't know well.]

I don't think there's something missing from them - they're are just different to you. They could equally argue that there's something missing from you because you find these situations a big turn off. Just because they find quiet solitude a big turn off doesn't mean there's something missing - they're just different to you.

There was another thread recently about Myers-Briggs personality types - I seem to remember one of the options was either introvert or extrovert, with a high proportion of us having introverted traits. My view on what you've said indicates to me that your traits seems to be more on the introvert scale - by that it means you don't need external stimulation, and are happy with your own company and enjoy reflecting. The 'wanters' (if that's what they're called in Scotland) are perhaps more on the extrovert scale - ie they need external stimulation to operate effectively.

Great thread - I'm off to reflect on this by myself somewhere and then I'll add some other thoughts!

 

[firecrest]

I can quite happily be on my own, I prefer it, however, when in Sweden and I got the chance to go off and camp alone, i turned back half way, it wasnt lonliness but fear of meeting people in the woods, I felt very defensless even though you didnt see people for miles I know I have no defence if I do meet a bad one I suppose if I can get out the first few nights I might feel like that then it aught to fade.

 

[durulz]

We've all said how we like time by ourselves and have no difficulty in our own company.
But there's a whole world of difference between having a night alone (or two, or three), knowing you will be going back to loved ones and a welcoming home, and being alone with no one to go back to except more loneliness.
I wonder how that difference affects our attitude to spending time alone...

 

[some like it cold]

I used to be very keen on my own company but the more friends i got the less i liked my own time, now im married i miss my wife even if we are apart for only a night.

Ive not been on any solo bushcraft trips but if i were i'd rather take my dog (although that little bitch would be the cause of more stress than work) im sure once i'd had a few days by myself i would settle into it again i suppose its all about what you are used to

ive travelled by myself but there were few days i didnt speak to someone and none where there werent other people around even if i never spoke to them