Naked and lost

[Deleted member 56522]

Scenario: You were on a stag/hen do and the next thing you know: you wake up naked in the middle of nowhere, the sun is getting low. What do you do? Priorities?

Details: it's early summer in what looks like Scotland. You're on a hillock giving good views many miles to the mountains all around except toward the sun where the horizon dips. There is no sign of any roads, fences or man-made shelters, just a few deer on the hills. From the hillock it is 200m down grassy patches of grey scree to the flattish valley bottom where the small river runs into a mixed species wood (looks like small withered oak, birch, willow, occasional pine & Scots Pine). Peering into the sun you see the wood fills the valley bottom as far as it can be seen. Upstream are patches of grass, heather, bog and bracken. You estimate two hours till sunset, three perhaps four till pitch black. The weather is dry, mild with patches of sunshine, but being naked on the hillock you are noticing the wind and already feeling cold.

The last thing you remember of your stag/Hen do, is boasting to your extremely rich friend that you could survive anywhere.

 

[TeeDee]

1 ) Seriously reconsider getting married.

 

[TeeDee]

Sensible answer.

If i don't remember getting there under my own steam it means I was carried there. As moving a unconscious mature human body requires many hands and or a vehicle in this case ( as I've been left in a remote area ) I would take a good recce around the area for signs and spoor leading to my location. Then follow that back if I find any which I would imagine would lead to a track/road. Once I have that I would consider following that back to civilization.

If none of that I would squat down and extract the smugglers cache I always have secreted within my person to provide my basic EDC

 

[gra_farmer]

Have you been watching 'Staggered' https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0111275/

 

[Tengu]

These things Do Not Happen to me as all my friends are hardnosed single.

 

[gra_farmer]

I have been clingfilmed to a lamp post naked in London once, not the same....but just as exposed

 

[Deleted member 56522]

Sensible answer.

If i don't remember getting there under my own steam it means I was carried there. As moving a unconscious mature human body requires many hands and or a vehicle in this case ( as I've been left in a remote area ) I would take a good recce around the area for signs and spoor leading to my location. Then follow that back if I find any which I would imagine would lead to a track/road. Once I have that I would consider following that back to civilization.

If none of that I would squat down and extract the smugglers cache I always have secreted within my person to provide my basic EDC

I'd suggest they are rich enough to have a helicopter and stupid enough to forget where they left you.

 

[Van-Wild]

Ooooh exciting! But why do we have to be naked? .

I'd legitimately be heading for that mixed woodland.

Find a pine to shelter under. Make a deep bough bed to burrow in to and curl up. Wait till morning. Prior to sleeping I'd drink as much stream water as possible because in this scenario it's very likely that I'd be super dehydrated already.

Next morning, up and drink more water before getting up to a high point to survey the land. Make a plan from what I see.

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[TeeDee]

I'd suggest they are rich enough to have a helicopter and stupid enough to forget where they left you.

Ok, so I will accept that I have no idea which way civilization is and I'm butt naked.

Using the Sun's positioning and other environmental factors we can establish a basic sense of N-E-W-S Direction. Not much use by itself , but a start.

Like Van wild I see no point in heading up unless for a short time to do an eyeball recce of the surrounding area if enough useful elevation could be obtained for minimal time and exposure to potential danger - ie no free climbing naked rock faces with nakedness.


I would be heading down into the woodland and river area after spending a good amount of time eyeballing the local area for any sign or indication of any other natural resource/asset or suggestion of some man made structure.

There would be I think more useful items and water at least in the mixed woodland/river area - a chance to get some rudimentary cover in quick time to at least shiver through the night.

They say if you follow a river you will always reach civilization in the end - probably true-also probably true not the shortest easiest route to civilization.

I would feel more comfortable in a woodland environment rather than on a mountain side.

 

[Kadushu]

I'm so hairy I'd be mistaken as Bigfoot.

 

[Van-Wild]

With this scenario in mind, (less the nakedness) I wander if such a scenario could be safely played out?

ie: is there someone on here that would allow such a scenario to be played out on their land? Someone who owns land with such terrain features?

Insurance or waivers aside, is such a training scenario a viable option for a long weekend???

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[forrestdweller]

being a big fan of the documentary about chicago's greatest citizen (who scored four touchdowns in one football game for Polk High in '66...) the risk of marriage can be avoided easily i'd also wonder how i got from central america to scotland (and freeze my rear end as it's too cold there for me...)

i wouldn't follow any tracks as that means following the kidnappers --as i'm not there on my own will it would mean following potential danger... i'd head for the woodland to make some shelter to survive the night, along the way keeping my eyes open for any item which might improve my situation. next morning i'd make my way downstream until reaching a big body of water, waiting until the mystical inhabitant turns up and hitch a ride back home into the tropics

on a more serious note: there's a book by an australian guy who picked up a hitchhiker and then found himself left in the deep outback without anything...

 

[MartinK9]

Get better friends.

 

[Deleted member 56522]

With this scenario in mind, (less the nakedness) I wander if such a scenario could be safely played out?

ie: is there someone on here that would allow such a scenario to be played out on their land? Someone who owns land with such terrain features?

Insurance or waivers aside, is such a training scenario a viable option for a long weekend???

Sent from my SM-A528B using Tapatalk

I posed the scenario after reading about Palaeolithic people living in Britain, and some people suggest they didn't have clothes. I then started trying to imagine what it would be like to be naked.

Personally, except for vowing never to speak to my "friend" again, I'm not sure what I would do. One option is to attempt to walk out and to keep going all night, but the ground is steep (scree) and I'm already cold.

I think the only option is to make it through the first night. So, I think the first thing is to get off the hill and into the wood, where there will be almost no wind. The next is to find a way to make the warmest "den" possible. I'm tempted to look for a pile of leaves and crawl into it!

 

[TeeDee]

I posed the scenario after reading about Palaeolithic people living in Britain, and some people suggest they didn't have clothes. I then started trying to imagine what it would be like to be naked.

Personally, except for vowing never to speak to my "friend" again, I'm not sure what I would do. One option is to attempt to walk out and to keep going all night, but the ground is steep (scree) and I'm already cold.

I think the only option is to make it through the first night. So, I think the first thing is to get off the hill and into the wood, where there will be almost no wind. The next is to find a way to make the warmest "den" possible. I'm tempted to look for a pile of leaves and crawl into it!

I've got butt naked outdoors a few times. Sometimes Rum induced and sometimes not. I agree for all of us it would be a difficult transition to make and make most things feel super awkward.

Ed Stafford is probably the current go to guy for seeing how well a typical westerner can get by in different temperature environments.

 

[TLM]

I read somewhere that natives of Tierra del Fuego are the most cold hardy people in the world. Apparently they have some cold adaptation. "Normal" us can adapt up to a point but that is limited, some people have natural "brown fat" cold adaptation but not all of us.

I can always take cooler temps better in the fall after a summer not wearing any extra, springs are more difficult after spending the winter in the tropics under clothing.

 

[Deleted member 56522]

Some days after sitting still at a desk I feel cold in a room at 22C, and then I can get up and walk a mile in the same clothes in temperatures of 12C. For a while I took cold showers and after a while, whilst not pleasant, you get used to it.

People say that after a while you can adapt to the cold. I don't know if that is just mental attitude or whether there is really some bodily adaption.

 

[Tengu]

TLM, you may be correct; the Fuegians were famed for their lack of clothes in a cold climate. Whether they were THE most cold adapted...no idea.

(The last Yaghan speaker died a couple of months back I believe).

The Neanderthals were well adapted to the cold, so I suspect they might not have bothered much with clothing.

 

[oldtimer]

Get 52 suitably sized leaves and make a pack of cards. Start playing a game of solitaire and you can be sure that in no time at all someone will lean over your shoulder to point out the move you've just missed. Then just ask them the way to go.

 

[nigelp]

Get 52 suitably sized leaves and make a pack of cards. Start playing a game of solitaire and you can be sure that in no time at all someone will lean over your shoulder to point out the move you've just missed. Then just ask them the way to go.

That’s very similar to the strategy: ‘start discussing the benefits of a more plant based diet and someone will soon appear to tell you that you are wrong’…