Incident while kayaking.

[MartiniDave]

First the background,

About 12 years ago I used to paddle quite frequently with my local canoe/kayak club. About 9 years ago for various reasons i gave up, but kept my boat and kit.

Time passes and I'm happily married with 2 step children, one is Michael, now 12. From time to time he remebers the Dancer kayak hanging in the top of the shed and asks "when can I go on the river..." My reply was always "when you had some proper training"
Recently the question changed to "when can I get some proper training?"
O.K., its a fair cop, I signed him up for his 2* with a local outdoor centre, the catch being because of his age I had to do the course with him. The end result he loves kayaking and so I end up looking up my old club and we rejoin.

O.K., whats the point? I hear you ask. Well I'm coming to that!

Last week Michael and I joined 4 other paddlers (2 children, 2 adults)from the club, none of whom we had met before, and set of along a local brook for a relaxing paddle. After we had gone about 300 yards I heaard the 2 kids at the front say "I don't know what it is, don't touch it go round it"
It turned out to be an adult male human corpse.
As you can imagine, that was the end of the relaxing paddle. One of the others went off to phone the police. I remained with the rest of the party, doing what we couldto keep the kids calm.

I've subsequently found out the deceased came from a nearby hospital, and had gone missing about 4 days earlier.

Michael has had a couple of days when he totally lost his voice, I think its delayed shock. I didn't sleep very well for a few nights. I think we're now over the worst.

I wouldn't wish a similar experience on anyone.

I thought long and hard before posting this, but felt I need to share it with someone.

Dave

 

[Tony]

Mate.....this is one of those posts where it's hard to know what to reply....I'm sure I speak for us all when I say I hope that it does continue to get easier to cope with. Seeing such things is horrid and shocking. Tell Michael we're thinking about him........

 

[steve a]

Dave, sorry to hear sure a shocking episode, not the type of thing I would wish anyone to be exposed to, least a 12 year old boy out enjoying himself.
Plenty of TLC and re assurance is all I can advise.
Good luck
Steve

 

[Adi007]

Shocking incident indeed Dave ... It must have been hard to share that. I'm glad to hear that you and Michale are getting over the worse of it. Thankfully, time does help with these things.
All the best to you and Michael.

 

[Roving Rich]

Sorry to hear this Dave. What a horrible episode. I hope you both get over the shock quickly, and continue to paddle onto happier waters.

Rich

 

[Jamie]

Dave

How utterly horrible for both you and Michael (and the other children as well). It must have been a reall shock to come across that scene and I wish you all well and hope that you are all able to get through this period.

 

[Kath]

Hi Dave - that's not an easy thing to deal with and the kind of thing we all hope we'll never have to deal with (or our kids have to witness). It must have been hard to share, too. Hardly on the same scale at all I know, but we came across human bones in a graveyard a while back, and I remember how hard that was for the kids to deal with (and me too if I'm absolutely honest). Hope you guys can work through it together - it's really important to try to talk about the experience and let the conversation go whereever it needs to... Don't be afraid to let kids see your emotions about it - if they see you act tough, they think they have to as well!

I know there's precious little support available for witnesses to crimes and people who make gruesome finds in the UK and they often have to deal with it on their own afterwards. Don't be afraid to seek help from your doctor if you need it...

Sending you all a <<cyberhug!>> :hug:

Kath

 

[MartiniDave]

Thanks to you all for the kind words (& the cyberhug Kath). I hope to get us both back on the water on Saturday afternoon.

Dave

 

[Wayne]

i was one of the first people to arrive at a motorbike accident a few years back. The biker was trying to over take a car and clipped the side of a coach which threw him off his bike. i managed to get a heartbeat back twice but he had broken his neck. when the ambulance arrived what seemed like hours later the paramedics just took a look and pronounced the guy dead.

I used to think i was pretty tough yet when i got home i cried for sometime. i still cannot drive past the spot without a lump in my throat. There is now a small memorial left by his loved ones. i cannot help thinking that if my first aid skills were better i might have been able to do more.