Are Good Manners Dying?

TeeDee

Full Member
Nov 6, 2008
6,365
773
46
Exeter
Bit of a venting topic I guess.

Do people feel Manners are as much in common parlance as they used to be or is there use getting less and less?

They seem to be used as much as people use their Indicators on Roundabouts.....

P and Q's !!!! And Gratitude's if someone does you a good turn - acknowledge it.




If manner are being used less and less - what do people put it down too?

( Go on - have a vent ! )
 
Last edited:

Robbi

Full Member
Mar 1, 2009
9,255
394
northern ireland
Please don't get me started!

The lack of manners, inability to speak even basic English ( as in "fink" instead of "think") general " wots ur problem" attitude. Driving / Road curtacy has gone out of the window.

Society my friend has broken.

Oh now look what you have done...... I need drink!
 

Broch

Full Member
Jan 18, 2009
3,933
3,116
Mid Wales
I suspect manners remain where they always were. Do you think the Bonfire Boys of the 1800's were well mannered? Let's be honest, our media streams mean we see all of society at all levels of social behaviour that probably wasn't as obvious before.

The language and differences in accent, grammar and the ability to articulate well have always existed and who's to say which is correct. Our spelling etc. has been decided by well to do academics not the people.

Having said all that I really hate it when well known presenters drop their T's (yes I'm talking about you Matt Baker :)).
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: zornt and Robbi

Wildgoose

Full Member
May 15, 2012
365
105
Middlesex
Far less conversation is face to face than previously. Keyboards and cars make people brave. Make an error on the road and people shout and swear from the safety of their drivers seat, I doubt they’d act that way on the pavement.
 

zornt

Forager
Apr 6, 2014
201
54
Ohio, USA
I find today that the people who go on about respect are usually the most disrespectful types.
I was raised on please and thank you.
Knock on their before entering a house.
Never just get in the fridge or dwarfs without an ok from the residents.
Hold a door for a person etc.
I taught my children the same values and they pass it on.
 

TeeDee

Full Member
Nov 6, 2008
6,365
773
46
Exeter
So do people use P & Q's? In general??

If you are buying something from a Shop keeper I still feel one should Use the 'P' and the 'Q' despite money changing hands.

I mention this and I've seen a few examples around for people asking for favours here without such a sniff as a simple innocent :-

' Please'
 

TeeDee

Full Member
Nov 6, 2008
6,365
773
46
Exeter
I find today that the people who go on about respect are usually the most disrespectful types.
I was raised on please and thank you.
Knock on their before entering a house.
Never just get in the fridge or dwarfs without an ok from the residents.
Hold a door for a person etc.
I taught my children the same values and they pass it on.

Sorry , Zornt.

I need to know...

Typo???? Yeah...?? ( Please tell me I'm Wrong !! :) )
 

TeeDee

Full Member
Nov 6, 2008
6,365
773
46
Exeter
Yes, I've got to agree with all of the above. For a generation that talk of respect they have no conception of the word!

Sent from Somerset using magic


I'm not sure if its Generational to be honest.

I'm not going to have a pop at the young just because they are Young, because I've met a few 'Mature' people that need a serious attitude adjustment. And on occasion I've strongly suggested that to them.


Some of the most polite people I've ever met are Canadians. No idea why. But it seemed ingrained into their culture.
 
  • Like
Reactions: zornt and Robbi

swotty

Space and time
Apr 25, 2009
1,703
101
Somerset
So do people use P & Q's? In general??

If you are buying something from a Shop keeper I still feel one should Use the 'P' and the 'Q' despite money changing hands.

I mention this and I've seen a few examples around for people asking for favours here without such a sniff as a simple innocent :-

' Please'
Definitely, please and thank you whether money's changing hands or not.
The expression I hate lately is "can I get" ....no, the shopkeeper will get it, one would like to have it!
May I have!!
Grrr.....think I may be getting an old git

Sent from Somerset using magic
 

swotty

Space and time
Apr 25, 2009
1,703
101
Somerset
I'm not sure if its Generational to be honest.

I'm not going to have a pop at the young just because they are Young, because I've met a few 'Mature' people that need a serious attitude adjustment. And on occasion I've strongly suggested that to them.


Some of the most polite people I've ever met are Canadians. No idea why. But it seemed ingrained into their culture.
Yep, I agree, it's not just younger people.

Sent from Somerset using magic
 

TeeDee

Full Member
Nov 6, 2008
6,365
773
46
Exeter
I suspect manners remain where they always were. Do you think the Bonfire Boys of the 1800's were well mannered? Let's be honest, our media streams mean we see all of society at all levels of social behaviour that probably wasn't as obvious before.

I had to Google them. Not sure what the point was you were making Broch? I'm sure there is but I suspect you're smarter than I and its bypassing me. Please expand.

I'm not talking about Media Streams necessarily , Just Life in general.

On the rare occasions I choose to descend from my Ivory Tower to mix it up with the Commoners I'm just aware of how things are changing. I'll admit I had a bit of a Draconian upbringing so I maybe a little more attuned / attentive / paranoid.

The language and differences in accent, grammar and the ability to articulate well have always existed and who's to say which is correct. Our spelling etc. has been decided by well to do academics not the people.

Are the Academics not ALSO the people?

I hope there is a line between handing control of language over to the larger Mob culture as there are so many beautiful and rare English words dying from not being used , and a surge of vulgar words making their way into the language ( Selfie time , Lush Innit!! )

( I may be a purist :) )




Having said all that I really hate it when well known presenters drop their T's (yes I'm talking about you Matt Baker :)).

Ahhh, Intolerance.... this is how it starts. :)
 
  • Like
Reactions: zornt and Robbi

TeeDee

Full Member
Nov 6, 2008
6,365
773
46
Exeter
Far less conversation is face to face than previously. Keyboards and cars make people brave. Make an error on the road and people shout and swear from the safety of their drivers seat, I doubt they’d act that way on the pavement.


I'm all up for people having Indicators fitted whilst walking. Sounds good . As does slow & Fast lanes on the Pavement.
 

Broch

Full Member
Jan 18, 2009
3,933
3,116
Mid Wales
I guess the point I was making was that there has always been a 'yob' culture that didn't give a fig about anyone else.

Yes, academics are a part of 'the people' but not a majority. There is more colloquial English spoken than 'Received Pronunciation', and always has been, but it's the latter that is considered 'correct'. I agree though, there have to be standards set in language or we wouldn't understand anyone else :)

I was out in 'town' yesterday and actually thought the very opposite - everyone was very polite and understanding :)
 
  • Like
Reactions: zornt

Van-Wild

Full Member
Feb 17, 2018
691
495
41
UK
Ooooh here we go.......... I used to get wound up by people's lack of manners. Used to spend a lot of time on letting it get to me......

Not anymore. You be you and I'll be me. You don't use manners? No problem, but I'll make sure I'll be extra nice to you. If you say thanks when I hold the door for you, I'll reply with a cheery 'youre welcome' as well. I treat others as I like to be treated, but I don't expect others to do the same. Its the way of the world.

The other day, I was working in a prison (signed in and escorted, not staying as guest! ) and when I was served my lunch by a prisoner, I said 'thank you sir'. He smiled and said that was the first time anyone had called him sir. Manners cost nothing, it was the way I was bought up and its the reason why my children use manners as well. If they're rude to anyone at all, they're rebuked immediately, wherever they are, as I was when I was young.

Maybe that's the reason for poor manners or poor social skills these days? There's no retribution for bad behaviour and the Internet allows people the right to comment in any way they choose, which leaks into real life? I dunno.... 'give a man a mask and he shall reveal himself'........

There's a lot of bravado in young men these days as well (I say this, being a sprightly 41 myself.....). A lot of tough guy acting..... all leads to conflict for no reason.

Sent from my SM-G970F using Tapatalk
 

TeeDee

Full Member
Nov 6, 2008
6,365
773
46
Exeter
I guess the point I was making was that there has always been a 'yob' culture that didn't give a fig about anyone else.

Hmm, I'd put Yob Culture in the Mods/Rockers , Skin heads , Antifa type bracket. - A cultural sub-group.

I more meant just a general lack in common usage across the board.




Yes, academics are a part of 'the people' but not a majority. There is more colloquial English spoken than 'Received Pronunciation', and always has been, but it's the latter that is considered 'correct'. I agree though, there have to be standards set in language or we wouldn't understand anyone else :)

I think we need gatekeepers to standards and Champions to ensure that they are in use in some way. I appreciate Language does evolve with the people and we don't use words from medieval times because we tend to , as a culture , ride the common apex of what words are in use.



I was out in 'town' yesterday and actually thought the very opposite - everyone was very polite and understanding :)


Sounds nice - I'm pleased for you.
 
  • Like
Reactions: zornt