Angry Squirrels

Swampy Matt

Need to contact Admin...
Sep 19, 2004
93
1
Midlands
I've just got back from my usual monday walk in my local woods, where i'd gone to practice my Nature Observation and Track Drawing skills.

Having Found a couple of nice dog prints to draw and watched a Jay I was feeling quite happy with my self, so started to head out of the woods, back home.

As I was walking along, I noticed a few squirrels feeding on the ground, just ahead of me. So i thought - ideal time for a bit of stalking practice and observation.

Keeping the wind in my face, i started to circle around a large holly bush, trying to use it as cover, keeping it between me and the squirrels. Just as i was coming around the edge of the bush, i come (literally) face to face with a large Squirrel.

I'm not sure who was the more suprised, but he took off up the nearest tree like a rocket, stopping a couple of metres above me, and staring at me with much flicking of his tail. Then the noise started.

He let out a loud chittering growl, sparking off the others who i'd first seen. Within second there were at least 5 of the little grey critters growling, barking and chittering at me - which then set off what seemed like every crow, pidgeon and magpie in the woods.

I had never realised that squirrels could be so aggressive! But i'll always remember now that a Squirrels alarm call is just as effective as a birds at sending the 'Big Predator Here!' signal accross the woods!

Matt.
 

Swampy Matt

Need to contact Admin...
Sep 19, 2004
93
1
Midlands
Definately!

I'd heard the noise many times before, but i'd always thought It was a bird or something.

It made me realise that Squirrels take quite a fright to get sparked up, but when they go, they really go.

I think its probably safe to assume that if Squirrels are shouting, the predator is fairly big.
 

leon-1

Full Member
Matt, it will be interesting to notice thier response to you the next time you are there, see if now that you have tried stalking them they treat you in any different way. Previously they may of made warning because you were a possible threat, now that you have tried stalking them they may percieve you as a very definite threat.
 

TheViking

Native
Jun 3, 2004
1,864
4
35
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I heard that squirrels can give a really nasty bite.... :shock: And if you get bitten, you would need a tetanus injection. :wink:
 

NickC

Member
Jan 24, 2004
40
0
Reading, Berkshire
You should see what happens when you have to climb a tree where there is a dray (not sure if the correct spelling) especially if there is young. Most Arborists seem to hate squirrels with a passion - I have even seen people defending themselves with a chainsaw or silky saw.

Cheers

Nick
 
A

Aelfred

Guest
You were lucky they were only shouting. The squirrels in the park near my house have taken a disliking to the faux fur collar on my housemates hood. Screaming and throwing things at her from above if she sits down on a bench!
 

Gary

Bushcrafter (boy, I've got a lot to say!)
Apr 17, 2003
2,603
2
58
from Essex
Well they are only fluffy tailed rats after all - anyone read James Herbet? :rolmao:

Seriously though they are tough buggers both in live and to skin!
 

TheViking

Native
Jun 3, 2004
1,864
4
35
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BIG-TARGET said:
just remember to aim between the eyes, sometime they charge when they're wounded!!!!!
There's no reason to shoot them. Would you be able to hit a little squirrel, that jumps and runs towards ya, between the eyes? :wink:
 

tenbears10

Native
Oct 31, 2003
1,220
0
xxxx
TheViking said:
There's no reason to shoot them. Would you be able to hit a little squirrel, that jumps and runs towards ya, between the eyes? :wink:

Viking in Britain the native red squirel is being pushed out by non native grey squirels which means they are fair game in terms of pest control. Reds are a protected species but are most often found in nature reserves where as greys are in most parks and woods in the UK.

Bill
 

TheViking

Native
Jun 3, 2004
1,864
4
35
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tenbears10 said:
Viking in Britain the native red squirel is being pushed out by non native grey squirels which means they are fair game in terms of pest control. Reds are a protected species but are most often found in nature reserves where as greys are in most parks and woods in the UK.

Bill
OK. I just believe that if there's no decent reason for killing and animal, people shouldn't do it. Hunting is okay, cause the law allows it, but in normal rules of behaviour, not.

When I was in work training, I was out walking in the woods with 31 small kids in the age of 5-6 year. At the end a little girl (approx. 5 years old) saw a slug and asked me if she should kill it, and I answered that she shouldn't! (because there was no reason to do it) Then she asked, why not? Then I said that it was something that she would have to decide with herself. :roll:
Just an example. :)
 

RovingArcher

Need to contact Admin...
Jun 27, 2004
1,069
1
Monterey Peninsula, Ca., USA
NickC said:
You should see what happens when you have to climb a tree where there is a dray (not sure if the correct spelling) especially if there is young. Most Arborists seem to hate squirrels with a passion - I have even seen people defending themselves with a chainsaw or silky saw.

Cheers

Nick

:eek:): That had to be hilarious watching full grown men/women using chainsaws to fend against them big bad squirrels. A woodland comedy or Bushcrafters nightmare. :lol:
 

maddave

Full Member
Jan 2, 2004
4,177
39
Manchester UK
This is a story about a biker getting attacked by a 'Skwerl' Long but very funny...

We always knew there was something sinister about squirrels... Neighborhood Hazard (or: Why the Cops Won't Patrol Brice Street Anymore) If you need a laugh, here it is.


I never dreamed slowly cruising on my motorcycle through a residential neighborhood could be so incredibly dangerous!

Little did I suspect ...I was on Brice Street - a very nice neighborhood with perfect lawns and slow traffic. As I passed an oncoming car, a brown furry missile shot out from under it and tumbled to a stop immediately in front of me. It was a squirrel, and must have been trying to run across the road when it encountered the car. I really was not going very fast, but there was no time to brake or avoid it -- it was that close.

I hate to run over animals, and I really hate it on a motorcycle, but a squirrel should pose no danger to me. I barely had time to brace for the impact

Animal lovers, never fear. Squirrels, I discovered, can take care of themselves! Inches before impact, the squirrel flipped to his feet. He was standing on his hind legs and facing my oncoming Valkyrie with steadfast resolve in his little beady eyes. His mouth opened, and at the last possible second, he screamed and leapt! I am pretty sure the scream was squirrel for, "Bonzai!" or maybe, "Die you gravy-sucking, heathen scum!" The leap was nothing short of spectacular ... as he shot straight up, flew over my windshield, and impacted me squarely in the chest.

Instantly, he set upon me. If I did not know better, I would have sworn he brought 20 of his little buddies along for the attack. Snarling, hissing, and tearing at my clothes, he was a frenzy of activity. As I was dressed only in a light T-shirt, summer riding gloves, and jeans this was a bit of a cause for concern. This furry little tornado was doing some damage!

Picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a T-shirt, and leather gloves, puttering at maybe 25 mph down a quiet residential street, and in the fight of his life with a squirrel. And losing...

I grabbed for him with my left hand. After a few misses, I finally managed to snag his tail. With all my strength, I flung the evil rodent off to the left of the bike, almost running into the right curb as I recoiled from the throw.

That should have done it. The matter should have ended right there. It really should have. The squirrel could have sailed into one of the pristinely kept yards and gone on about his business, and I could have headed home. No one would have been the wiser.

But this was no ordinary squirrel. This was not even an ordinary angry squirrel. This was an EVIL MUTANT ATTACK SQUIRREL OF DEATH !

Somehow he caught my gloved finger with one of his little hands and, with the force of the throw, swung around and with a resounding thump and an amazing impact, he landed squarely on my back and resumed his rather antisocial and extremely distracting activities. He also managed to take my left glove with him!

The situation was not improved. Not improved at all. His attacks were continuing, and now I could not reach him. I was startled to say the least. The combination of the force of the throw, only having one hand (the throttle hand) on the handlebars, and my jerking back unfortunately put a healthy twist through my right hand and into the throttle. A healthy twist on the throttle of a Valkyrie can only have one result. Torque. This is what the Valkyrie is made for, and she is very, very good at it. The engine roared and the front wheel left the pavement. The squirrel screamed in anger. The Valkyrie screamed in ecstasy. I screamed in ... well ... I just plain screamed.

Now picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a slightly squirrel-torn-t-shirt, wearing only one leather glove, and roaring at maybe 50 mph and rapidly accelerating down a quiet residential street on one wheel and with a demonic squirrel on his back. The man and the squirrel are both screaming ****** murder. With the sudden acceleration I was forced to put my other hand back on the handlebars and try to get control of the bike. This was leaving the mutant squirrel to his own devices, but I really did not want to crash into somebody's tree, house, or parked car. Also, I had not yet figured out how to release the throttle ... my brain was just simply overloaded. I did manage to mash the back brake, but it had little effect against the massive power of the big cruiser.

About this time the squirrel decided that I was not paying sufficient attention to this very serious battle (maybe he is an evil mutant NAZI attack squirrel of death), and he came around my neck and got INSIDE my full-face helmet with me. As the faceplate closed part way, he began hissing in my face. I am quite sure my screaming changed intensity. It had little effect on the squirrel, however. The RPMs on The Dragon maxed out (since I was not bothering with shifting at the moment) so her front end started to drop.

Now picture a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a very raggedly torn T-shirt, wearing only one leather glove, roaring at probably 80 mph, still on one wheel, with a large puffy squirrel's tail sticking out of the mostly closed full-face helmet.

By now the screams are probably getting a little hoarse. Finally I got the upper hand ... I managed to grab his tail again, pulled him out of my helmet, and slung him to the left as hard as I could. This time it worked ... sort-of. Spectacularly sort-of ... so to speak.

Picture a new scene. You are a cop. You and your partner have pulled off on a quiet residential street and parked with your windows down to do some paperwork. Suddenly a large man on a huge black and chrome cruiser, dressed in jeans, a torn T-shirt flapping in the breeze, and wearing only one leather glove, moving at probably 80 mph on one wheel, and screaming ****** murder roars by and with all his strength throws a live squirrel grenade directly into your police car.

I heard screams. They weren't mine... I managed to get the big motorcycle under control and dropped the front wheel to the ground. I then used maximum braking and skidded to a stop in a cloud of tire smoke at the stop sign of a busy cross street. I would have returned to fess up (and to get my glove back). I really would have. Really. Except for two things. First, the cops did not seem interested or the slightest bit concerned about me at the moment.

When I looked back, the doors on both sides of the patrol car were flung wide open. The cop from the passenger side was on his back, doing a crab walk into somebody's front yard, quickly moving away from the car. The cop who had been in the driver's seat was standing in the street and was aiming a riot shotgun at his own police car. So the cops were not interested in me. They often insist to "let the professionals handle it" anyway. That was one thing. The other? Well, I could clearly see shredded and flying pieces of foam and upholstery from the back seat. But I could also swear I saw the squirrel in the back window, shaking his little fist at me. That is one dangerous squirrel. And now he has a patrol car. A somewhat shredded patrol car ... but it was all his.

I took a deep breath, turned on my turn-signal, made a gentle right turn off of Brice Street, and sedately left the neighborhood I decided it was best to just buy myself a new pair of gloves. And some Band-Aids

"Author: Daniel Meyer"
 
B

bombadil

Guest
:rolmao: :rolmao: :rolmao:
Brilliant.....
Now all the people in the shared computer room at Bangor Uni think I'm a laughin lunatic...... hehe
 

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