tip of the day

[kristophish]

Ok I found this out the hard way so I thought I would share my knowledge
in case anyone had the same idea as me.









DO NOT.!!!!! I REPEAT. DO NOT CALL YOUR PREGNANT WIFE JABBA!!

for some reason she didnt find it as funny as me..

 

[crosslandkelly]

View attachment 22952I just choked on my tea.

 

[santaman2000]

NEVER!!! NEVER!!! Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night!

 

[Stamp]

Its an oldy but still good advice...........

"Never eat Yellow Snow!

 

[presterjohn]

Ok I found this out the hard way so I thought I would share my knowledge
in case anyone had the same idea as me.







DO NOT.!!!!! I REPEAT. DO NOT CALL YOUR PREGNANT WIFE JABBA!!

for some reason she didnt find it as funny as me..

The Mrs just asked me what I just laughed at. Apparently I have called her worse :-(

 

[Stamp]

Me too, just not to her face ;-)

Sent from my Lumia 800 using Tapatalk

 

[Mesquite]

I've often called my wife the little runt, her usual response is somewhat more impolite

Also, if we're out shopping and I've bought something small and the shop assistant asks if I want a bag I say no thanks, I've got an old one already ...

She does love me... sometimes

 

[kristophish]

I've often called my wife the little runt, her usual response is somewhat more impolite

Also, if we're out shopping and I've bought something small and the shop assistant asks if I want a bag I say no thanks, I've got an old one already ...

She does love me... sometimes

I call her that too. Although I spell it ever so slightly different. Haha.

 

[Mesquite]

I call her that too. Although I spell it ever so slightly different. Haha.

I get away with it because she's only 4'11"

 

[Man of Tanith]

Do not repeat do not laugh not even nervous verging on hysteria laughter when she is giving birth........


Ask me how I know. ...

 

[leedsbrew]

Do not repeat do not laugh not even nervous verging on hysteria laughter when she is giving birth........


Ask me how I know. ...

And definitely don't start telling her how the chair you've been sitting in all night has given you a sore back...........*** was I thinking!

 

[Man of Tanith]

And definitely don't start telling her how the chair you've been sitting in all night has given you a sore back...........*** was I thinking!

I bet that comes up a lot in "conversation"

 

[Salaud]

Never ever shout"AVE IT! !" In a peter kay voice whilst servicing the missus.....They just dont see the humour

 

[Mesquite]

Do not repeat do not laugh not even nervous verging on hysteria laughter when she is giving birth........


Ask me how I know. ...

My son was born by planned c/section and during the procedure the anesthetist peeked over the little curtain they had erected across her midriff and said to me 'oh... the baby's head's out, do you want to have a look?' to which I replied 'No thanks, I've seen alien.' to which there was a moment of stunned silence in the operating room then just about everyone cracked up.

Luckily my ex was so far gone on the various drugs they'd given her she hadn't heard

 

[Tadpole]

Do not say 'yes' to anything you've only half heard. It's always the wrong answer.

 

[Man of Tanith]

My son was born by planned c/section and during the procedure the anesthetist peeked over the little curtain they had erected across her midriff and said to me 'oh... the baby's head's out, do you want to have a look?' to which I replied 'No thanks, I've seen alien.' to which there was a moment of stunned silence in the operating room then just about everyone cracked up.

Luckily my ex was so far gone on the various drugs they'd given her she hadn't heard

That story makes me chuckle every time Steve.
I even tell it t mates as a warning when they are collectively in the family way

 

[MacFeegle]

My youngest was C section and when they were tugging away I asked if they wanted me to pull back on my end, you could have heard a pin drop.
Later in the recovery room when I was saying hello to my daughter I asked her what we should do with the tatty old box she came in and the exes mum gave me a backhander. Got to learn to keep my gob shut

 

[Eragon21]

Do not under any circumstance fall asleep in the chair during your wife'e 16hr labour, its 13 years later and funny thing is she still hasn't forgoten or let me forget!!!!!!

 

[rik_uk3]

Never ever shout"AVE IT! !" In a peter kay voice whilst servicing the missus.....They just dont see the humour

Blimey, whatever happened to the 'family forum' BCUK used to be

I don't see the humour either.

 

[munkiboi182]

never get viagra stuck in your throat. gives you a stiff neck!!!