A Halloween near-death experience

Harvestman

Bushcrafter through and through
May 11, 2007
8,656
26
55
Pontypool, Wales, Uk
Well, yesterday, anyway. Last friday of the month at work is dress-down day. Being just before Halloween it was dress up for Halloween day. So, not having a ghost or zombie costume, I thought "What could be scarier than a viking?" and so I went as one. :viking:

22627348221_4526634f3c_b.jpg
[/url]Dressing up by Michael Kilner, on Flickr[/IMG]

The Dave Budd cloak pin is about the only bit of authentic gear there, but the cloak is a wool blanket and that is a real axe on my hip (and i got to wear it all day, in public, and the local police HQ is on our work site :D). In work I also had my hammock boots on instead of shoes, as they look a bit like viking shoes (if you close one eye, and most of the other one).

Anyway, I won the prize for best costume. So into the boss's office I went to collect my prize box of chocolates. In the resulting small talk I mentioned how much I liked her Adams Family Morticia look.



Turns out she wasn't in costume...

:yikes: :goodnight:
 

GGTBod

Bushcrafter (boy, I've got a lot to say!)
Mar 28, 2014
3,209
26
1
You can only go one worse than that and ask a girl with extra belly weight when she is due
 

dewi

Full Member
May 26, 2015
2,647
13
Cheshire
You can only go one worse than that and ask a girl with extra belly weight when she is due

No, no, I think you'll find its worse when your ex-partner tells you she's gained weight due to a thyroid problem, giving the response "What are you taking for that? Pies"

That gets you in to a whole world of trouble.
 

GGTBod

Bushcrafter (boy, I've got a lot to say!)
Mar 28, 2014
3,209
26
1
Genuinely did that once GGTBod. Ooops :eek:

Good to know i am not alone as I said it to my cousin, she already had 3 kids and her tubes tied lol how was i meant to know she was just a heffer?

Dewi at least she was already your ex
 

Insel Affen

Settler
Aug 27, 2014
530
86
Tewkesbury, N Gloucestershire
Reminds me of the stories about new soldier at the Pioneer Regiment. As Pioneers, they are famous for their massive axes, so new recruits were often told to return the cerimonial axe back to the store (they just happened to have to nearby). Said recruit was also slipped a note and told to go via the paymaster in the Regimental Accountant's office. Of course the soldier had no idea that the paper had written on it, "Give me all your money! Now!"
 

woof

Full Member
Apr 12, 2008
3,647
5
lincolnshire
After carrying out a drug search deploying the passive drug dog, a "young lady" was arrested, who became quite vocal calling in to question my parentage & that of my dog, a colleague attempted to defuse the situation by asking when she was due.... she ended up having to be restrained.

Rob
 

Laurentius

Bushcrafter (boy, I've got a lot to say!)
Aug 13, 2009
2,534
700
Knowhere
Reminds me of the stories about new soldier at the Pioneer Regiment. As Pioneers, they are famous for their massive axes, so new recruits were often told to return the cerimonial axe back to the store (they just happened to have to nearby). Said recruit was also slipped a note and told to go via the paymaster in the Regimental Accountant's office. Of course the soldier had no idea that the paper had written on it, "Give me all your money! Now!"

I once knew a young man, (well he was young then) who was a bit of a tearaway. When I showed him my axe out in the woods, he asked where I got it from and I gave him the name of a local army surplus store. Anyway he went to this store, picked up an axe and then walked out with it, cos you know who is going to challenge a guy with an axe. Justice did catch up with him and he did some time for his theft, but it was the newspaper report of a mad axeman that amused me. He had a very mild temperament in reality.
 

rik_uk3

Banned
Jun 10, 2006
13,320
27
70
south wales
Good to know i am not alone as I said it to my cousin, she already had 3 kids and her tubes tied lol how was i meant to know she was just a heffer?

Dewi at least she was already your ex

WOW, did I miss something in the thread or was it just a twunt comment?
 

GGTBod

Bushcrafter (boy, I've got a lot to say!)
Mar 28, 2014
3,209
26
1
Lol what's a twunt comment? I was just being sarckie about my cousins girth
 

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