Longbow lad said:
Excellent !!!................
I've been caught a couple of times outdoors when it's been in the old 'departure lounge' too, but nothing as funny as your story. That really made me laugh
Tales of Woe from the Woods
- Thread starter Mantic
- Start date
Excellent !!!................
I've been caught a couple of times outdoors when it's been in the old 'departure lounge' too, but nothing as funny as your story. That really made me laugh
trip to Northumberalnd last year - car written off half a miles from the site and no tent poles in the bag when we got there.
I posted this awhile back on BB. I guess my tale of "woe" isn't so much about hardship, but more in line with missing out on the quality time spent in the woods. It is to easy to let the quagmire of life overflow into R & R time. I know I am guilty of this. At any rate... here is the story:
My life is busy. I work well over 45 hrs a week, have three Daughters, and a very active family. All my In-laws live in town , and we are forever busy with day to day "stuff". I had a chance recently to spend a night in the woods by myself. I try and do this at least once or twice a year, and have managed to do so for the last 16 years. It was time well spent, however sitting by the fire that night, I realized something. It may have been the shot of Jack Daniels in my coffee, but I had just hiked in 6+ miles, on a trail I hadn't walked before. I was concentrating on obviously where I was going and what I needed to do to prepare for the night. I really didn't take the time to "take it in" so to speak.
I know I'm guilty of doing this every day. It's sad, but most of the time I am in GO mode. Get busy and get it done. Well unfortunately I did the same thing out in the woods that day. The next day back I didn't make the same mistake. I took my time, looked everything over, and enjoyed myself. I had a time to be back (for safety) and my Wife would be expecting me. But I managed to accomplish what I set out for in the first place.
I'm sure I'm not the only one guilty of this, but just thought I would share. If you get the chance to head out... make the most of your time
Mantic said:
Bad news: I think they went on to shoot up a couple of hippies:
http://www.ezrider.co.uk/Easy_Rider/easy_rider_walkthrough_13.html
Back in NZ I was on a hunting trip with a mate in early spring. We started off on a cool evening hiking into a back country hut. The mountain tops were still snow covered and the river was running with snow melt. We had been going for about 2 hours and were now walking under torchlight when we came to a river crossing. No problems wed done this before and I went in first. Man it was cold, the melted snow had bought the water temperature right down. The water was only knee deep and not particularly fast, as I was about ¾ of the way through the inevitable happed. I slipped over and went backwards into a hole that completely submerged my pack, and all of me bar my right forearm which was holding my rifle. My mate of course doubled up with laughter as I emerged dripping from the river yelling comments like now that I was wet, could I piggy back him across to keep his boots dry. You know the sort of smart **** thing. My muscles, all nice and loose and warm from the 2 hr walk contracted to about a hundredth of their length before. Cramp and a headache started to settle in and of course I just ignored it and continued to hike on. About 5 mins down the track my mate recognised that I was doing so well and called a halt to the hike and we camped there and then.
With a fire going, a change of clothes and a hot chocolate I felt 100% better.
Lessons learned?
Be careful crossing even shallow rivers
Snow makes water cold
Good mates, whilst initially taking the pi**, will look after you when you need it.
Double bagging all your gear in your pack is well worth it. There is nothing as nice dry clothes, food and sleeping bag after a dunking
With a fire going, a change of clothes and a hot chocolate I felt 100% better.
Lessons learned?
Be careful crossing even shallow rivers
Snow makes water cold
Good mates, whilst initially taking the pi**, will look after you when you need it.
Double bagging all your gear in your pack is well worth it. There is nothing as nice dry clothes, food and sleeping bag after a dunking
Ha! Another tale, which, although annoying at the time, has it's funny side.
Why didn't you use the rifle as a stick to help you wade across? (joke)
I tend to double bag clothing and eats - the (minimal) extra weight is well worth it for these kind of times. A mate of mine ignored my advice and kept his sleeping bag OUTSIDE his pack, wrapped in a Tesco carrier bag.
Strangely enough, he had to try and dry it over a fire....in the rain.
Why didn't you use the rifle as a stick to help you wade across? (joke)
I tend to double bag clothing and eats - the (minimal) extra weight is well worth it for these kind of times. A mate of mine ignored my advice and kept his sleeping bag OUTSIDE his pack, wrapped in a Tesco carrier bag.
Strangely enough, he had to try and dry it over a fire....in the rain.
On one of my day trips with my friends to the local wood we decided to take food rather than eat wild food. Seems fair, only we couldnt make our mind up what to take. eventually we packed and set off on the walk to the woods. When we got there we unpacked and realised that what we had planned was very different to what we had taken.The list was as follows;
2 billy cans small and medium sized
1 packet of noodles
1 tin of baked beans
1 onion
2 cup a soups
mince
We thought we would be ok as long as we could cook everything there and followed a motto that we made up of "If you have it it will go well together"
It didnt at all. We were both very ill for the next two days.
2 billy cans small and medium sized
1 packet of noodles
1 tin of baked beans
1 onion
2 cup a soups
mince
We thought we would be ok as long as we could cook everything there and followed a motto that we made up of "If you have it it will go well together"
It didnt at all. We were both very ill for the next two days.
Ah latrines, that brings back memories... On a pretty rough trip in Africa, we also went into the Okavanga delta. You're not allowed to take soap, toothpaste or shampoo in there so as not to polute the water but alcohol, no-one can stop you bringing that in right? Had a great time there, the latrine was dug near the water, about 20 meter away from the tents. If you had to go in the night, flash your torch and notice many glistening eyes. Could be hippos, could be crocs. Needless to say not many people went to the latrine in the night. Beware of damp patches near the tents in the morning.
Anyway, some folks brought a brandnew videocamera. Bought just before we came into the Delta as things tend to be cheaper in Botswana. They were testing it out, near the waterside, as you do. They might have drunk a little too much perhaps on this occasion. The testing was more succesful than they thought in fact!
When I went to visit them a few months later we watched the video of that trip. Somehow they managed to read the instructionbook for 15 minutes while the camera was purring away, unnoticed to them. It had in fact shot 15 minutes of a latrine, freshly used by one of our fellowtravellers who appeared to have a good appetite. A delicate piece of paper on top of something an elephant would have been proud of.
We're hoping to have a reunion next year but I can never take the elephantman serious after this, nor the couple who were too slushed to notice they shot 15 minutes of latrine.
Anyway, some folks brought a brandnew videocamera. Bought just before we came into the Delta as things tend to be cheaper in Botswana. They were testing it out, near the waterside, as you do. They might have drunk a little too much perhaps on this occasion. The testing was more succesful than they thought in fact!
When I went to visit them a few months later we watched the video of that trip. Somehow they managed to read the instructionbook for 15 minutes while the camera was purring away, unnoticed to them. It had in fact shot 15 minutes of a latrine, freshly used by one of our fellowtravellers who appeared to have a good appetite. A delicate piece of paper on top of something an elephant would have been proud of.
We're hoping to have a reunion next year but I can never take the elephantman serious after this, nor the couple who were too slushed to notice they shot 15 minutes of latrine.
when i was very much younger i went through the utility belt phase (i think quite a few people do ) i had this thing about adding "useful" things to it
well i found this foldable shuvle .
now my mate thought it was daft - one bit of kit too many -but i carried it on that bely for nearly two weeks,with me mate ripping the pi## all the time about it .
But i showed him when we found ourself with a job of a small hole to dig .
i proudly lifted the shuvle ffrom its pouch on the belt ,put the shuvle on the earth and pressed down with my foot
snap
the thing broke instantly
that was OVER 12 years ago + and i still get reminded of it
well i found this foldable shuvle .
now my mate thought it was daft - one bit of kit too many -but i carried it on that bely for nearly two weeks,with me mate ripping the pi## all the time about it .
But i showed him when we found ourself with a job of a small hole to dig .
i proudly lifted the shuvle ffrom its pouch on the belt ,put the shuvle on the earth and pressed down with my foot
snap
the thing broke instantly
that was OVER 12 years ago + and i still get reminded of it
A sort of self-imposed woe...
In 2001, my son (8 at the time) and I had taken a family class on survival - the kids spent most of the day among them selves with the instructors, while the parents did things together too... So the kids built shelters, did camoing, bowdrill fires etc.etc., learning the survival basics.
After our class, we went to some friends to spend a week there. We were supposed to look after their home for the first two or three days, then they would be back and we would have the rest of the week together.
They left about half an hour after we arrived. We had just put the tent cloth outside to dry and some socks and underwear in a bucket, and were planning on making ourselves some food. Then... we managed to shut ourselves out!!!
There was no open window, we had no key, no money, no food, and just some summer shorts and T-shirts, and a tentcloth but no poles. I knew that my friends never really had much contact with their neighbors. Here we were, in a garden which bordered on a wooded hillside leading to a swamp. In the rear of the garden was plenty of wood; there were no plants that I knew to be edible except for a little Sheep sorrel. And there was an outside water tap.
So rather than breaking a window, I decided that we hadn't taken our class for nothing so we could build ourselves some shelters in the garden. We went two days without food, and although my son found it hard at times, we kept our spirits high singing songs and telling stories, meanwhile pulling the ticks off us every once in a while. At night, a deer visited the garden to graze, and a Fox passed by.
After a little more than two days, as we were sitting in the grass, my friends pulled up in the driveway, and greeted us saying "I see you're enjoying the sunny afternoon"... while we were really yearning for food, a bath and a good rest!
Live and Love,
Anneke
In 2001, my son (8 at the time) and I had taken a family class on survival - the kids spent most of the day among them selves with the instructors, while the parents did things together too... So the kids built shelters, did camoing, bowdrill fires etc.etc., learning the survival basics.
After our class, we went to some friends to spend a week there. We were supposed to look after their home for the first two or three days, then they would be back and we would have the rest of the week together.
They left about half an hour after we arrived. We had just put the tent cloth outside to dry and some socks and underwear in a bucket, and were planning on making ourselves some food. Then... we managed to shut ourselves out!!!
There was no open window, we had no key, no money, no food, and just some summer shorts and T-shirts, and a tentcloth but no poles. I knew that my friends never really had much contact with their neighbors. Here we were, in a garden which bordered on a wooded hillside leading to a swamp. In the rear of the garden was plenty of wood; there were no plants that I knew to be edible except for a little Sheep sorrel. And there was an outside water tap.
So rather than breaking a window, I decided that we hadn't taken our class for nothing so we could build ourselves some shelters in the garden. We went two days without food, and although my son found it hard at times, we kept our spirits high singing songs and telling stories, meanwhile pulling the ticks off us every once in a while. At night, a deer visited the garden to graze, and a Fox passed by.
After a little more than two days, as we were sitting in the grass, my friends pulled up in the driveway, and greeted us saying "I see you're enjoying the sunny afternoon"... while we were really yearning for food, a bath and a good rest!
Live and Love,
Anneke
Black kissa that sunds like a real adventure you had yourselves, I wouldn't call it a woe.
Having said that, I bet you guys really needed that bath
I consider myself lucky as not really having anything so tragic, and may I say, funny happen to me I think the worst I can muster is sleeping under one of the old style army poncho's with the hoods one windy rainy night I'd forgot to tie off the hood.
I slept well until my sleeping bag felt wet, my initial half sleepy worry was that I'd had a number one accident, not something I'm prone to do since I was five but seemed a rational fear anyway, however, the hood had worked its way open in the rain and the rain had collected in it until it reached over flowing. Silly sod!
Paul
Having said that, I bet you guys really needed that bath
I consider myself lucky as not really having anything so tragic, and may I say, funny happen to me I think the worst I can muster is sleeping under one of the old style army poncho's with the hoods one windy rainy night I'd forgot to tie off the hood.
I slept well until my sleeping bag felt wet, my initial half sleepy worry was that I'd had a number one accident, not something I'm prone to do since I was five but seemed a rational fear anyway, however, the hood had worked its way open in the rain and the rain had collected in it until it reached over flowing. Silly sod!
Paul
mantic,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,had similar thing happen to 58 water bottles at catterick, frozen solid, so like a prat i hit it aginst a tree to break the ice,,,,,,,,,,,,broke the bottle, lol, lol, lol you live and learn,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,lol,
My wife has been looking at this thread and she's just reminded me, they're right elephants never forget, of a something that happened that didn't really cause me any woes at the time. But just like a minute ago it comes back to haunt me every now and again.
Basically, I'd been on an exercise, and had gone down with flu, not man flu mind you, but propper very ill next to death flu. Anyway we were some distance from civilization and the only vehicle there was a four tonner, I didn't warrent being wizzed off so I got dumped on the field nurses present whilst the boys went and played.
The nurses were great making me brews, keeping the fire going and generally keeping my spirits up. I have to say having four nurses focus all of their attention on you isn't a bad way to pass the time. Anyways night came and I was struggling with chills so in good Nurse Nightingale fashion I became the filling in an Army nurse sandwich. To be honest I was to ill to appreciate the situation, Honest!
Once home I recover and all is well, until I get home to a very cross looking wife some time after. Anyway turns ou she's heard about my expliots in the back of the lorry and isn't overly pleased with me.
Whilst I think she was pulling my chain with hind sight, it still comes up now and again and I was most certainly feeling the woe when she confronted me
Pib
Basically, I'd been on an exercise, and had gone down with flu, not man flu mind you, but propper very ill next to death flu. Anyway we were some distance from civilization and the only vehicle there was a four tonner, I didn't warrent being wizzed off so I got dumped on the field nurses present whilst the boys went and played.
The nurses were great making me brews, keeping the fire going and generally keeping my spirits up. I have to say having four nurses focus all of their attention on you isn't a bad way to pass the time. Anyways night came and I was struggling with chills so in good Nurse Nightingale fashion I became the filling in an Army nurse sandwich. To be honest I was to ill to appreciate the situation, Honest!
Once home I recover and all is well, until I get home to a very cross looking wife some time after. Anyway turns ou she's heard about my expliots in the back of the lorry and isn't overly pleased with me.
Whilst I think she was pulling my chain with hind sight, it still comes up now and again and I was most certainly feeling the woe when she confronted me
Pib
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