Life & Grind

TeeDee

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Nov 6, 2008
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Life.

The day to day experience of walking the path of Life.

Would people say its getting easier or harder?

Is the life we have now easier than the one our parents or their parents experienced?
 
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Van-Wild

Full Member
Feb 17, 2018
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Life is what it is. You can make it hard or you can make it easy.

Life now is not more difficult than times gone by, it just different. Everything is relative.

You can make your life a whole load easier by keeping your circle small, spending wisely and not worrying about things that you cannot control.

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nigelp

Native
Jul 4, 2006
1,417
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New Forest
newforestnavigation.co.uk
I think things are too complicated these days.

Technology is great, but it often makes things harder instead of easier.

How did people research before the Internet?
They went to university if they had that opportunity or college and evening classes. Lots of books in the library. The harder part is learning ‘how’ to study and research.
 

TeeDee

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Nov 6, 2008
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I think maybe I was more meaning the ratios of cost vs 'things' vs salary - which in itself is a measure of time & labour and surely time and labour IS life??

The cost of home ownership or renting seems to be so much of a proportional income that I wonder if there was a 'sweet spot' of income vs outgoings in latter years - maybe not as much technology but enough of what we 'need' as opposed to those things we believe ( or have been programmed ) to 'want' ?
 

Robson Valley

On a new journey
Nov 24, 2014
9,959
2,669
McBride, BC
I did my research in libraries and scientific journals. I still do.
I buy discounted reference books (abeBooks.com) by the dozen.

I've disintegrated. I have a housekeeper, a gardener/snow shoveller, a shopper and now a construction handiperson much stronger and more flexible than I am. Yes, they cost me. Yes, they are all part time, weekly, fortnight and so on. Yes, much less expensive than I imagined.

They have alleviated a lot of frustration and that's colored my attitude for certain.

OTOH, the hardest thing to do is nail down a trades person (plumber, electrician, carpenter, etc). They are all really busy out here, all day, every day. So little dumb jobs such as I might have get passed over.
 
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nigelp

Native
Jul 4, 2006
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newforestnavigation.co.uk
I think maybe I was more meaning the ratios of cost vs 'things' vs salary - which in itself is a measure of time & labour and surely time and labour IS life??

The cost of home ownership or renting seems to be so much of a proportional income that I wonder if there was a 'sweet spot' of income vs outgoings in latter years - maybe not as much technology but enough of what we 'need' as opposed to those things we believe ( or have been programmed ) to 'want' ?
It can be a hard ‘life’ if you are on a low salary or have high outgoings. Our great Nanny Frost considered most folk well off nowadays with their own homes, two cars, holidays, mobile phones, TV’s etc. most of those are not ‘needed’ in many cases. They are material gain that need a large salary to obtain and keep. You don’t actually have to have them if you don’t want them.
When I first rented at 19/20 I spent most 60/70% of my wages on rent and the like.
 
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Wander

Native
Jan 6, 2017
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Here There & Everywhere
IHow did people research before the Internet?

Blimey.
I'm more worried by people who think research is using the internet.
Any idiot can start a website and post any rubbish on it.
I'm not saying books are infallible, but there are more checks in place.
As an ex-university lecturer, I told my students not to use the internet (there are some trustworthy sites out there, but I wanted to instil in them a habit of rigorous research and internal debate rather than clicking a mouse or the dreaded cut 'n' paste), and if I did see any internet resources in their bibliography their work would automatically be scrutinised for plagiarism (above and beyond the random sample that would be checked anyway).
 
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Wander

Native
Jan 6, 2017
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Here There & Everywhere
Each person has their own life and has the option to take it down whatever path they want. You can choose to make it harder or easier; particularly in how you learn to respond to the hard parts and take control of your reactions to it. Most of its in your ‘mind’ so you have the ability to change that aspect of life of you want to.

That.
In spades.

I think maybe I was more meaning the ratios of cost vs 'things' vs salary - which in itself is a measure of time & labour and surely time and labour IS life??

Fair enough. But I still think Nigelp's reply (above) answers that, especially the last sentence.
 

dwardo

Bushcrafter through and through
Aug 30, 2006
6,463
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Nr Chester
I think to start some are born with many more possible paths than others. Changing your life from within a refugee camp is going to be less guaranteed than someone born into a middleclass family in a wealthy western country.

If you are lucky enough to be born into the latter then choices become relative. I believe its then a choice of how you wish to stack your chips. Some lean heavily toward the material and some dont. Some folk want to be told what to do and are safe and happy doing it, others feel dread at the same possibility. Some folks will work 20 hours overtime a week forgoing family and friends so they can holiday abroad each year or own that new car or shiny other thing. Some go the other way and try to spend less and so work less and spend more time with family and friends, pursue the opposite for which I am struggling for a word...

Then there is the big ole factor of procreation which has a massive effect on financial and life choices.

Which ever way you factor your spending children are incredibly expensive and so have a massive impact on your financial responsibilities. This I believe ties into What TeeDee was getting at. So are we better off now as a family unit than we were in the past?
I believe the biggest impact here is how many hours the parents now have to work to support a modest family. When I was growing up Mums stayed at home and Dads went to work, atleast for the first 10 years or so. Dads would earn a decent wage and a good pension, retire and have something to leave for the kids. This is now more like both parents having to work full time which then means two car`s, childcare and other costs. Pensions are now worth nothing unless you put in a massive amount and even then that's if they are still around and not been squandered by your employers Hedge fund managers. Which is no matter really as the retirement age keeps getting pushed forward until its simply a hole that opens under your desk and recycles what's left.

We have let big corporations get bigger and they now dictate our politics. This now has a direct effect on our choices and how much spare time we have and what we think that time (very short time on this planet!) is worth..

Cheery thoughts for a Monday. However I do think things have a good chance of changing but its going to be a rough transition.
 
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saxonaxe

Settler
Sep 29, 2018
512
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80
SW Wales
Each person has their own life and has the option to take it down whatever path they want. You can choose to make it harder or easier; particularly in how you learn to respond to the hard parts and take control of your reactions to it. Most of its in your ‘mind’ so you have the ability to change that aspect of life of you want to.
And on that theme...Arnie's comments on vision, goal, 'doubters' and failing sometimes, are valid I believe. It's a bit American dramatic with moody lighting and music, try to ignore that and listen to his words. Just think for a moment that it's an Immigrant with hardly any English language capability who is giving the advice. Whatever else you think of him, he speaks from experience.
 
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TeeDee

Full Member
Nov 6, 2008
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Exeter
I think to start some are born with many more possible paths than others. Changing your life from within a refugee camp is going to be less guaranteed than someone born into a middleclass family in a wealthy western country.

If you are lucky enough to be born into the latter then choices become relative. I believe its then a choice of how you wish to stack your chips. Some lean heavily toward the material and some dont. Some folk want to be told what to do and are safe and happy doing it, others feel dread at the same possibility. Some folks will work 20 hours overtime a week forgoing family and friends so they can holiday abroad each year or own that new car or shiny other thing. Some go the other way and try to spend less and so work less and spend more time with family and friends, pursue the opposite for which I am struggling for a word...

Then there is the big ole factor of procreation which has a massive effect on financial and life choices.

Which ever way you factor your spending children are incredibly expensive and so have a massive impact on your financial responsibilities. This I believe ties into What TeeDee was getting at. So are we better off now as a family unit than we were in the past?
I believe the biggest impact here is how many hours the parents now have to work to support a modest family. When I was growing up Mums stayed at home and Dads went to work, atleast for the first 10 years or so. Dads would earn a decent wage and a good pension, retire and have something to leave for the kids. This is now more like both parents having to work full time which then means two car`s, childcare and other costs. Pensions are now worth nothing unless you put in a massive amount and even then that's if they are still around and not been squandered by your employers Hedge fund managers. Which is no matter really as the retirement age keeps getting pushed forward until its simply a hole that opens under your desk and recycles what's left.

We have let big corporations get bigger and they now dictate our politics. This now has a direct effect on our choices and how much spare time we have and what we think that time (very short time on this planet!) is worth..

Cheery thoughts for a Monday. However I do think things have a good chance of changing but its going to be a rough transition.

Pretty much that.

I'm not sure if the 'grind' was as long or as hard or any shorter or any easier in any other timeframe - but it seems that is what it is - an erosive grind.

Maybe I need to take peoples comments on board and moderate/lessen my expectations and make my world 'smaller' but it still seem that there is an amount of critical elements that surely NEED to be addressed and the grind is eternal.

I'm probably musing a little and stoicism can be useful to give oneself a hard cold slap in the face to realise that things are just hard. And thats ok. Hard is acceptable.

But I do worry about the generation or two younger than I and how anything other than a fairly nihilistic outlook is rare and uncommon and somewhat justified.
 

Van-Wild

Full Member
Feb 17, 2018
1,526
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UK
Pretty much that.

I'm not sure if the 'grind' was as long or as hard or any shorter or any easier in any other timeframe - but it seems that is what it is - an erosive grind.

Maybe I need to take peoples comments on board and moderate/lessen my expectations and make my world 'smaller' but it still seem that there is an amount of critical elements that surely NEED to be addressed and the grind is eternal.

I'm probably musing a little and stoicism can be useful to give oneself a hard cold slap in the face to realise that things are just hard. And thats ok. Hard is acceptable.

But I do worry about the generation or two younger than I and how anything other than a fairly nihilistic outlook is rare and uncommon and somewhat justified.

Mindset mate. Your mindset may be a little off....

If you see life as a grind, you're mind is already in the negative.

I dont live to work, I work so it pays me money to do what I love. Spending time with my wife and kids is worth more to me than my job. Fortunately, I enjoy my job. If I didn't, I'd quit and get another job.

Being a stoic is a good approach to life, but there is a tendancy to focus on the endurance of hardship. Read into it a little bit more and even the great Stoic Marcus Aurelius said 'ask yourself at every moment, is this necessary?'. Hardship should be overcome, not endured.

And don't waste your time worrying about the next generation. They don't even know you or even give two hoots about you or your opinion. They'll survive.

Be present. Involve yourself in the now. When your partner/child/friend is speaking, listen. Put the phone down and engage in the now. By doing so you will be present and that is where your life is. Deal with things that are in front of you and do not concern yourself with what you cannot control.

And don't read the news for God sake. It's all nonsense.

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British Red

M.A.B (Mad About Bushcraft)
Dec 30, 2005
26,888
2,140
Mercia
I dont live to work, I work so it pays me money to do what I love. Spending time with my wife and kids is worth more to me than my job. Fortunately, I enjoy my job. If I didn't, I'd quit and get another job.
This. So much this. I had a really good job. I enjoyed the job, but the last few years some of the people made it unbearable. So I just quit. It was scary but oh so worth it. Now, I do contract work if I need big money and gig work for small money, but I've never been happier. I wish I'd changed my life sooner.

Oh and don't listen to the petty, shriveled souls who justify their own misery by being critical of other people's views and lives. They are usually just bitter and unhappy people who mask their own intolerance by trying to make others miserable. Simply treat them as the waste of oxygen that they are and do what makes you smile!
 
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