Why the hell did I bother!

[sandsnakes]

I have a couple of friends who were desperate to get away for the weekend. So I lent them some of my kit, I showed them how to put up a tent, pack gear away. And supplied them with much sage advice!

The kit has just been returned, or should I say dumped in my conservatory. They managed to get the sleeping bags wet yet they roll them up and put them in the bags and left them in my hot conservatory, they unrolled the tent and left it as a mess and a pile. And out of stupidity they did not bother to apply the mozzie repellent and both of them look like badly hammered raw steak. Yet they claimed they had a great time. Unfortunately from me I assumed that the sleeping bags were dry, now while these are only nylon two season bags they do have cotton insert. So here I am cleaning up kit and trying to preserve two brand-new sleeping bags.

An act of kindness to friends who were very stressed and just needed to get away from the London ****. But I asked myself why did I bother.

Yours in ranting and rage mode

Sandsnakes

 

[janiepopps]

My condolances SandS, I made a rule a long time ago that I never lend anyting out if I would be upset if it either didnt come back or came back in bits.

Guess that doesnt make your day any better tho

j

 

[JonathanD]

RULE #1
Never, Ever lend your kit. It can and often does lead to broken friendships

 

[rapidboy]

Been there before and while it's sometimes hard to refuse someone it's often easier in the long run.
It's the same with tool's at work.
The way i look at it is that if they don't have their own they won't know how to use it or look after it.


I learn't the hard way myself,
SAK used to gut fish on a rock - should have seen the shape of the blade after that and it hadn't even been washed.
Tightening a screw with a Spyderco :bluThinki
Vango tent with the end ripped clean out of the inner
Fishing reel rusted solid (why even bother to return it)
Trangia, soot on outside and remains of dinner inside

Like janiepopps said, I now only lend kit that you won't mind if it doesn't come back or comes back wrecked.

 

[Toddy]

Me too, generally. It cuts when stuff you've worked for, chosen, and bought to use is carelessly vandalised or never returns.
I have very few friends I happily share kit and books with.

Toddy

 

[Bisamratte]

Im always happy to lend things to people, but I have one rule....You break it, you've bought it. It sounds a bit harsh but it makes people think a bit more and I've never had anything badly damaged. (currently touching as much wood as possible)

You really shouldn't have to say anything though,Its a matter of respect for other people and their property.

Just my 2p worth
Andy

 

[CLEM]

I have learnt from past experience never to lend kit out!

 

[yarrow]

I lend advice but never kit

 

[Seagull]

Thats just too bad, SandyS.

These friends, clearly had no idea of just what your possessions mean to you and maybe they just dont have any concept of that kind of concern, or their own responsibilitys.

If they are real friends, then it would be good for you to explain the way you feel about what they,ve done.....and, to prevent you becoming a little bitter, I think you should find a way to do just that, with a little more forethought than they have shown.

Sounds good and caring, dosn,t it?

I gotta admit that my first thought, was a whole lot less benevolent (marmelize em!)


Ceeg

 

[British Red]

Strange thought,

I value my friends more than my kit - they can borrow any of it (and,keep it as long as they need it more than me).

Then again, none of my friends would return kit in that state (unless they didn't know any better). I reckon you have one of two possibilities here SS;

1. They didn't understand not to stuff a wet sleeping bag etc.
2. They aren't real friends

Lack of understanding is forgiveable - disregard for the property someone else was kind enough to lend you isn't. YMMV

Red

 

[stonyman]

I'm a selfish person and I never lend my kit out, I used to but after I was given back my Trangia with crud in the bottom that took a long soak in almost industrial strength pan cleaner and then a wash in the dishwasher before I would even consider cooking in it, I no longer lend anything out.

 

[beowolf762]

Turnabout is fair play, or you could

 

[leon-1]

Sandsnakes, unfortunate mate, it happens though.

There are a few ways around this happening again, firstly as someone else said, don't lend the kit out again. Secondly, go with them and minder your kit (why the hell should you have to). Thirdly only loan kit to people that you know to be competent in its use and that will treat it with respect (I would say treat it like thier own, but I have seen some peoples personal kit).

Lessons hard learnt are sometimes too easily forgotten.

 

[philm4]

I happily lend out kit, but only to people who have used that type of kit before, and only lend when I think the person cannot afford that kit themselves, otherwise they should buy their own. People who are borrowing kit they cannot afford, rather than can't be bothered to buy, treat it with a lot of respect and are always greatful. Conversely people who can't be bothered to buy their own kit normally don't see the value in it and can't be bothered to look after yours.

I also lend kit to people on worthy missions such as charity activities, if the kit is wrecked that is my contribution to the charity.

 

[Zodiak]

Lending your kit was a nice thing to do, especially to help out friends who don't realise the damage that they might have done, but I agree that its irritating when it comes back wrecked.

People not involved with bushcrafting don't seem to understand the cost of this stuff, and certainly not the effort that goes into mainting it.

Nowdays I keep back all my old gear which I don't use anymore and if somebody wants to borrow that its fine, but I don't lend out decent stuff. Except my wife keeps borrowing my folding saw and doesn't put it back. I think she must be using it for her toe nails

 

[JohnC]

Ive had my family tent, burner and gas bottle, plus a lot of other bits and pieces returned in ok condition, (luckily as we needed them this last week). The friends we lent them to would have been mortified to return anything in a broken or dirty condition. I would expect signs of wear on a lent item, and when borrowing a car would clean/wash it before returning it as a thank you. Did you challenge your friends about the state of the kit?
Some people are so used to the throwaway nature of items and the "service industry" that they dont realise their behaviour is wrong.
Either way, sorry to hear your experience, you did do the right thing in helping out friends though, it's a pain about the extra cost its lead to.

 

[SowthEfrikan]

Often hike with a group from a nearby university and a lot of the gear on trips is from the university, as often there are students out hiking for the first time. Nothing like that has ever happened, perhaps because they all take their cue from the rest of us.

Common courtesy dictates that you return things, promptly, in the condition they came to you.

The only person I share my personal gear with is my hubby and he knows better than to wreck anything.

That's too bad. If they treat your stuff that way they are likely to eventually treat you that way, too.

 

[Spacemonkey]

Londoners...

 

[C_Claycomb]

I am really sorry your friends didn't look after your kit.

In such situations I always undergo an internal battle. My generous side, wanting to help someone out, fighting with the part of me which puts a high value on looking after/maintaining my tools and kit. I am not proud to say that for me it is safer to not lend kit. I do not react well to it coming back in a mess, particularly if the culprits are un-appologetic. Its not the value of the damage that hurts, but that people I consider friends place such a low value on my feelings when it becomes apparent that their thoughtlessness has upset me.

SandSnake, hope you can work things out with your friends, AND get your kit cleaned up!

 

[pierre girard]

Know what you mean. My brother once "borrowed" a #4 Duluth pack I had stored at my father's house. He lent it out to someone else and can't remember who. As he is my brother - and he didn't borrow it directly from me - he apparently felt no need to replace the pack.