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Discussion in 'Bushcraft Chatter' started by ukbushmonkey, Aug 14, 2010.
Did you make noises like a cars engine?
I even acted like i was holding the wheel !
We had a super market with a corridor behind the cashiers with entry/exit doors at each end. I biked in from one end and out the other
Staff screamed "You're not allowed to do that!!!" I screamed back "I know!!!".
Having thought about this a bit, I realised a mate of mine was Random. After reading a book about a man who lead a lot of his life at the throw of a dice, my mate decided to copy him. As a result of this had lead a very odd life for a while and the best example was that he was due up on a disciplinary charge at work, so what to wear? The dice said it had to be flowery shirt, shorts and flip flops. After that was over with, his next thing to do was jump of one of the local piers..
Well, needless to say, much like the original man he decided to lead a normal decision making life and no more dice.
Would love to have seen that lol
I have many most are not repeatable in public
One that is however,we had a group of mates round at the house when the electric went off with a snow storm that suddenly came in. So we went out about midnight and made a large snowman on top of a bus shelter. The following week the a boy that lived around the corner wrote a story in school about the snowman on top of the bus shelter. He got into trouble for making things up as it was meant to be a factual story they were writing in class, no amount of pleading it was true would persuade the teacher otherwise. Not long after this my wife got a job as a teacher in that school and was telling the snowman on top of a bus stop story when one of the other members of staff owned up to giving the lad into trouble for telling lies!!!
I moved to South Korea.
it was a sunday evening, around midnight, decided to go for a little ride, cycled one of my usual sprinting routes ( just over 10 miles) got home, put the key on the door, thought to myself **** it, took it back out, got back on my bike then cycled the 30 miles to southend, like an idiot sat down at the sea front for just over a hour and my legs seized up , trains were out of service that night so went into my pocket to get my phone, i had forgot it, stumbled my way to the pay phone, luckily i had some change in my tool kit, rang my dads mobile and got picked up in the early hours of the morning
while i was waiting it started to rain
that was a couple of years ago
i also sat about 20 foot up a tree in a local woods all night (9pm to 3am) listening to the radio
Whilst working security and a factory that was being de-commissioned, I decided that walking to do the rounds was so last year and decided to ride a trolley with caster wheels whilst pushing myself with an old mop. I even talked the next shift in to having a race before we went home.
I also learned that explaining CCTV footage can be embarrasing.
HE he, now if were getting into security guard stuff, i used to work as one in a shopping center in Eastleigh, it was the first job i had, and being a rebellious teenager, it was perhapse not the best, we also had trolly races but as patols were one man beep gun affairs it was more of a time trial around the malls, we once had a silent night beds display stand, which led to one of my patrols lasting four hours when 1.5 was the norm. I also moved into a 20,000 sqfoot unit as i had no where else to live, this combined with a spate of pigeon deaths around the loading bay led to me being encouraged to leave! so i went to work for a large cable making firm in the area as a pilkington guard(great job), untill joining up in 2000. i left a whole rooms worth of furnature, about four carp rods and loads of tackle in that unit which now has a littlewoods in it.
I biked 10 miles, bought an ice cream and biked home again.
No wait, once I happened to be close to the harbor so I took the ferry to Denmark. I still don't know why but it seemed the right thing to do at the moment.
I've had a number of moments on mountains which I'm not telling you about. And I can't always claim youth and inexperience as an excuse.
I once met a big Bulgarian guy (he was more than 6' 6") in Malta who led me astray. There was, of course, drink involved and when we were "between venues" we walked past the German Embassy, which I remember him stopping to view whilst muttering something in Russian about his granny. A few hours later, I found myself standing on his shoulders beneath the balcony, not believing my luck that the double headed eagle shield was secured with wing-nuts. The Germans think of everything!
The next thing I remember, the Bulgarian had miraculously disappeared and I was being huckled by 2 Maltese Polis who said they never wanted to see me again.
I knew exactly what they meant!
I never saw my Bulgarian friend again, but heard that he'd been arrested at the airport with the thing in his bag.
Hehe thats great, I have the flag from the US embassy in Guyana.again rum fuelled fun.
Of course, Southey. Tourists are supposed to collect momentos.
My old climbing partner, The Neebs, had a nasty streak!
We were sitting in the sunshine on a narrowish ledge, legs dangling, half way up a Scottish mountain drumming up a brew... as you do!
Another party (which had the brass neck to be on our mountain when we arrived) were climbing close by, one member of which was showing signs of insecurity.
My mate unclipped and shimmied along the ledge, tapped the guy on the shoulder and asked him if he had a light.
We finished our brew and climbed on while the guys mates tried to prise his fingers off the rock.
That really is wicked
That got a propper gut laugh, poor chap.
Many moons ago 3 car loads of mates were feeling a bit bored of a friday evening so decided to go for a big mac! The slight problem was for us a big mac was a 240 mile round trip, Any way off we went and Macdonalds was shut so we had a burger king instead. On arriving back late on in the wee small hours we parked up at our usual haunt for a chinwag and bit of banter with a few other guys. When we said that we had been away to Inverness for a burger one chap had a wee laugh and drove off. The next day happened to bump into him and he was looking extremely tired. Whats up I asked? and he laughed and said he liked the idea of going for a burger so much he decided to go to Edinburgh for some Rock Now that was probably at least a 520 mile trip!
After a few pints of dizzyade I thought it would be a good idea to get on my mates car bonnet, let him floor it to 40mph, and see what happened when he slammed the brakes on. Then we put it on youtube!
Thats nuts lol you must have been hurt?