1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Stoopid jokes

Discussion in 'Other Chatter' started by nickliv, Dec 4, 2010.

  1. Alan De Enfield

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2018
    Messages:
    310
    Likes Received:
    202
    Location:
    Rural Lincolnshire
  2. Bishop

    Bishop Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2014
    Messages:
    1,291
    Likes Received:
    260
    Location:
    Llanelli
  3. Alan De Enfield

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2018
    Messages:
    310
    Likes Received:
    202
    Location:
    Rural Lincolnshire
    My mate has been collecting the "Osteopathy Monthly Magazine" for 20 years. He says that he has a lot of back issues.
     
    Insel Affen likes this.
  4. Bishop

    Bishop Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 25, 2014
    Messages:
    1,291
    Likes Received:
    260
    Location:
    Llanelli
    Why can't you here a Pterodactyl in the toilet?


    Because the "P" is silent
     
  5. Alan De Enfield

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2018
    Messages:
    310
    Likes Received:
    202
    Location:
    Rural Lincolnshire
    One night a man walks into a bar looking sad. The barman asks the man what he wants.

    The man says “Oh just a beer”.

    The barman asked the man “What's wrong,why are you so down today?”.

    The man said “My wife and i got into a fight,and she said she wouldn't talk to me for a month”.

    The barman said “So what's wrong with that?"

    The man said “Well, the month is up tonight”.
     
    Native Nathan and Insel Affen like this.
  6. Nice65

    Nice65 Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 16, 2009
    Messages:
    4,027
    Likes Received:
    871
    Location:
    W.Sussex
  7. Deekin

    Deekin Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2019
    Messages:
    1,202
    Likes Received:
    512
    Location:
    Scotland
    When I was in Dubai, I was amazed that the people there do not like the Flintstones, when the people in Abu Dhabi do.
     
  8. Deekin

    Deekin Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2019
    Messages:
    1,202
    Likes Received:
    512
    Location:
    Scotland
    Out bird watching today, bumped into Sinead O'Connor, I asked if she'd seen much, she told me "so far it's been seven Owls and fifteen Jays."
     
  9. Van-Wild

    Van-Wild Nomad

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2018
    Messages:
    297
    Likes Received:
    162
    Location:
    UK
    Why did the turkey cross the road?




    Because it's a helicopter!



    My son. Aged 6.........

    Sent from my SM-G903F using Tapatalk
     
  10. Herman30

    Herman30 Nomad

    Joined:
    Aug 30, 2015
    Messages:
    356
    Likes Received:
    114
    Location:
    Finland
    ?????????????:O_O:
     
  11. Insel Affen

    Insel Affen Settler

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2014
    Messages:
    516
    Likes Received:
    77
    Location:
    York, N Yorks
    I was in the garden the other day when I heard music. I looked around and realised it was coming from the veg patch. As I walked over I could hear it was actually Bee Gees songs!!

    I just couldn't find where it was coming from and eventually I got down on my hands and knees to see if I could find the source. Finally I realised it was in the herb section, then it struck me...............................

    .....................

    It was just the Chives talkin'!
     
  12. bearbait

    bearbait Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2009
    Messages:
    825
    Likes Received:
    85
    Location:
    Mid-Wales, UK and British Columbia, Canada
    That is definitely worth a grooaaaan...
     
    Insel Affen likes this.
  13. Nice65

    Nice65 Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 16, 2009
    Messages:
    4,027
    Likes Received:
    871
    Location:
    W.Sussex
    If it wasn’t the Stoopid Jokes thread, he’d be getting his coat. :D
     
    Insel Affen likes this.
  14. Glass-Wood-Steel

    Glass-Wood-Steel Full Member

    Joined:
    Jul 31, 2016
    Messages:
    57
    Likes Received:
    20
    Location:
    Cheshire
    Two parrots sitting on a perch.
    One says to the other "can you smell fish?"
     
    Van-Wild likes this.
  15. Keith_Beef

    Keith_Beef Native

    Joined:
    Sep 9, 2003
    Messages:
    1,320
    Likes Received:
    228
    Location:
    Yvelines, north-west of Paris, France.
    Two sausages and an egg are in a frying pan.

    The egg says "it's bloody hot in here!"

    One sausage turns to the other and says "hey, did you hear that? A talking egg!!"
     
  16. bearbait

    bearbait Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2009
    Messages:
    825
    Likes Received:
    85
    Location:
    Mid-Wales, UK and British Columbia, Canada
    My wife's driving me to drink.

    Lucky man, me!

    Saves me getting a taxi.

    I'll get my coat...
     
    santaman2000 and Van-Wild like this.
  17. bearbait

    bearbait Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 9, 2009
    Messages:
    825
    Likes Received:
    85
    Location:
    Mid-Wales, UK and British Columbia, Canada
    My wife said that sex is better on holiday.

    .

    .

    Let me tell you...that was not a nice postcard to get.
     
    Hammock_man and Woody girl like this.

Share This Page