Unwanted visitors

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ANDYRAF

Settler
Mar 25, 2008
552
0
66
St Austell Cornwall
I have just been bearded in my lair by some religious devouts, I must say first that I have no problem with other peoples religion as long as they don't try to sign me up to it. How does one discourage them when they are so intent and not listening, this time I used the survivalistic approach and informed them that my god is Sgt major Robert Lee Ermey:headbang: , this confused them so much that it gave me time to close the door without slamming it.

Any other suggestions. Preferably polite suggestions.

MOD's if this is inappropriate please strike it from the forums, Thank you.

Andy.:thinkerg:
 

IntrepidStu

Settler
Apr 14, 2008
807
0
Manchester
I normaly tell them that I would be happy to discuss religion and then ask for their home address so I can come round to their house for the discussion as I am busy at the moment. Needless to say, they dont actualy want YOU calling at THEIR house, so they make their excuses and leave pronto.
 

Scally

C.E.S.L Notts explorers
Oct 10, 2004
358
0
51
uk but want to emigrate to NZ
my farther once let them into his house and listend to there cause for one and a half hours then once they finished he put his case across (stopped their interuptions stating he didnt interupt them) 2 hours 45 mins being in the house they fled never been seen on his street ever again !!! got to have the time !!
 

Twoflower

Nomad
May 11, 2007
261
0
46
Northants
For some strange reason I get approached in the streets by the religious types. I don't have a problem with people having faith etc etc but I do have a problem with them trying to convert me. (I do have a theory about why so many approach me though, I've been told I look like Jesus what with the hair and the beard, although i'm not from the middle east. It is this resemblance that these people see and think they will score extra brownie points with him/her upstairs if they convert a Jesus tribute act)

I've used all kinds of deterents from telling them I am a practicing druid right through to blatently telling them to p*** off (even I have an off day!). Some of my lines have included the following:

Bible Welding Commuter - "Excuse me, Have you read the bible"
Me - "Yes I have, I found that chapter .. whats it called now.. revelations, that's it .. was most informative and helpful towards my plan of world domination."
Needless to say that guy just turned round and started hassling someone else.

Smart Suited Cold caller - "Hello, do you have a spare minute to talk about god?"
Me, looking flustered "Errm, yeah hold on" (shouting into the house) "hey babe, can you grab that goat and put my knife away .. (turning back to door) .. Can you guys give me 5 minutes to clean up?"
I shut the door made a coffee and for some reason they left.

I've been told by various people that I'm going to hell, so I may as well go with a smile and a good CV.
 

JohnC

Full Member
Jun 28, 2005
2,624
82
62
Edinburgh
Regrettably even when I have (truthfully) told doorstep folk that I am an elder in the Church of Scotland they didnt give up.
Always happy to talk about faith, but I don't like doorstepping...
 

phaserrifle

Nomad
Jun 16, 2008
366
1
South of England
A couple of them came to my house recently. as i'm under 18 they first asked if my parents where around, and when I said no they where both out the guy asked me if I was interested in the bible. I told them I was a pastafarian (beliver in the flying spaghetti monster)
 

Toddy

Mod
Mod
Jan 21, 2005
38,938
4,570
S. Lanarkshire
I politely tell them I hope they have a nice day but please don't preach religion at me and close the door.
The Mormon lads are very courteous, the Legion of Mary say, " Bless You!", the Jehovah's Witnesses try to smile, the Evangelical Christians tell me I'm going to burn in Hell for Eternity, the Church of Scotland hope I have a nice day too but isn't this weather terrible........they get an offer of a cuppa 'cos they know my Auntie and I'll never hear the end of it and she will give me Hell if I don't offer :eek:
The little Bhuddists beg some butter for their feast and give joyful thanks and offer to sing for me :D
The neo pagans come to the back door and sit themselves down in the garden :eek: telling me they 'knew' this would be a welcoming haven :confused: .............interestingly so do the bushcrafters, and one of these days the two will bump into each other :lmao: I think I'll send up prayers that the neighbours are out that day :D
Love and peace......... abruptly interrupted as the squirrel and the pigeons come to visit followed by their immediate capture and prep for dinner :rolleyes:

My Father was once disturbed at his dinner by a young couple who introduced themselves as David and Susan asking if they might come in and have a discussion.
My Dad responded, "Son, I'm sure Susan and I could find something to talk about ;) but you're just not to my taste." They left.

atb,
Toddy

p.s. The Bushcrafters of the Church of the Chilled out in the Outdoors are more than welcome, the kelly kettle is in the shed if I'm not home :D
 
At university some JVs or Mormons visited some friends of mine in their student house. The guys (my friends) were very polite and invited them in and sat them down in the lounge. They then excused themselves for a moment, grabbed their coats and quietly left the house to go down to the pub. When they returned some hours later, the "missionaries" had left ...


... without nicking anything ;)
 

durulz

Need to contact Admin...
Jun 9, 2008
1,755
1
Elsewhere
I don't tell them I belong to any other religion, because that only invites discussion.
I tell them that I do not believe, am not looking to believe, and that I do not wish to get drawn into a conversation on the subject. Then wish them well and close the door.
 

Mike Ameling

Need to contact Admin...
Jan 18, 2007
872
1
Iowa U.S.A.
www.angelfire.com
I like that idea of asking for their home address to ... pop on by ... for that chat. And that would be THEIR home address, not the address of their church building.

Sometimes (when I'm in a good mood) I'll start trying to convert them to Buddism or Cargo Cultism, or some other "religion" - especially BOB and the church of the eternal slacker!

When you interrupt their "canned speal" they almost have to give up and go away - almost.

They quit stopping by my uncle's place years ago. When they would drive into the yard and then have that one pretty young lady come over to "talk" with him, he would shake her hand --- and then keep shaking her hand --- and continue shaking her hand with both of his --- and smile without his false teeth in --- and without cleaning off any grease/oil/paint on his hands from whatever projects he was working on. When it would become obvious that the young lady wanted to leave, he would let go - usually about the time one of the other car doors would open. He did this a couple times, and "those people" quit stopping by to "save his soul". Plus word got around, and the others quit stopping by also. Now, my aunt would just tell them NO - LEAVE and shut the door. But she always enjoyed the "show" when they got to my uncle first.

The head religion prof in the local college loved to "entertain" people prostelitizing - especially the Mormons. He'd invite them in to ... talk ... about Their bible. But he'd actually debate with them - quoting several versions of the bible - including their's. He usually could quote the Book of Mormon better than them. To him it was an enjoyable intellectual discussion for several hours. But word started getting passed around, and all the groups soon quit stopping by his place. So he'd watch for them "working" the neighborhood, and then go visit one of his neighbors just before they would get there. His whole neighborhood seems to be a zealot-free zone right now.

Now, any of them stopping in at my yard have to be pretty committed. With me playing around with "fire and brimstone", horns and antlers hanging on poles scattered about the yard along with assorted animal parts/skulls, "strange" markings on stones lined up in ... suggestive patterns, etc. etc. (Roman glyfs, Viking runes, oak stumps with shapes deeply burnt into their tops, with a few Elfin Orcish and Starfisher words/symbols thrown in.) But I still have to work on that stone alter/crypt (cut limestone table and bench).

Hmmmm ... come to think about it, it has been a while since I've been bugged by any of them. The word must have finally gotten around to all the usual "groups".

Mikey - that grumpy ol' German blacksmith out in the Hinterlands
 

Tengu

Full Member
Jan 10, 2006
12,781
1,518
51
Wiltshire
Oh, I never get bothered by them, since they are my relatives and know Im unsavable.

(they are darlings really)
 

Dan1982

Full Member
Jan 14, 2006
1,002
125
41
Cumbria
I live in a top floor flat and the only way they can speak to me is over the intercom. when i get bored i just hang up!! rude but effective!! ;)

Dan :D
 

spamel

Banned
Feb 15, 2005
6,833
21
48
Silkstone, Blighty!
I live in a top floor flat and the only way they can speak to me is over the intercom. when i get bored i just hang up!! rude but effective!! ;)

Dan :D

I suppose you could say:

"Hang on a second, I just need to get the cat away from the fish tank, etc"

And then step out onto your balcony with your water balloons! Loads of fun!

:D
 

demographic

Bushcrafter (boy, I've got a lot to say!)
Apr 15, 2005
4,691
710
-------------
I just politely say that I have no interest whatsoever in their brand of fiction thankyou very much.

I don't discriminate at all, its all unprovable rubbish created to keep people in line now thinking that they will go to a better place when they die.

My mother is in the JWs and tried for years on end to convert me but her evidence anecdotal, sadly lacking and almost all of it from one book.
Never worked out why people associate religion with morality cos I'm struggling to make the link personally.

Meh.
 
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